Athena (00:00:03): Have you been zombified by screens? Dave (00:00:07): I mean has anyone not at this point? Athena (00:00:09): [Athena laughs] Yeah, we are all zombified by screens. [Dave agrees] Yeah, screens in our pockets, screens in the movie theater screens, our television screens. Dave (00:00:21): Yeah, everywhere, so yeah. Athena (00:00:22): Yeah- Dave (00:00:23): And sometimes both. Sometimes I'll be watching a movie with my kids and they'll have their phones out and I'll have my phone out so screens on top of screens. Athena (00:00:32): Wow. Welcome to the Zombified podcast, your source for fresh brains. I'm your host, Athena Aktipis, psychology professor at ASU and chair of the Zombie Apocalypse Medicine Alliance. Dave (00:00:44): And I'm your cohost, Dave Lundberg Kenrick, media outreach program manager at Arizona State University and screen enthusiast. [Athena laughs] Athena (00:00:52): Screens, brains. Dave (00:00:55): Exactly so- Athena (00:00:55): The intersection of brains and screens. Dave (00:00:57): I think that's our eyeballs. But, yeah. So, who are we talking to today? Athena (00:01:03): Today we are talking with Ilana Rein who is a filmmaker and so we talk about lots of different aspects of screens. We talk about our personal experience with sort of dealing with that tension of how much do you put of your own life onto other people's screens. We talk about how your own life can inspire filmmaking because for Ilana, a lot of her experiences with her family and especially with her mom who had Alzheimer's really influenced her filmmaking. Dave (00:01:42): Interesting. Athena (00:01:43): Yeah. So we take a personal and kind of philosophical approach to all of these complex issues around how we grapple with screens and film and content that we are sharing with the world more broadly. Dave (00:01:58): Cool. Now, uh, what is your favorite part of today's episode? Athena (00:02:02): My favorite part of today's episode is how Ilana really shares a lot of intimate details about her life and her family in a... a way that makes you feel like she's, you know, your, your neighbor, your best friend. Like you're just sitting down and having a conversation with someone who's really willing to talk about deep issues. Dave (00:02:32): Cool. Athena (00:02:34): Yeah. So let's hear from this week's fresh brain, Ilana Ryan. Intro: (00:02:39): [Psychological by Lemi] Athena (00:03:15): Welcome to Zombified. Ilana (00:03:17): Thank you for having me. Athena (00:03:19): So just to start, would you, um, introduce yourself in your own words? I mean, we know each other actually, you know, I think of all people I've ever interviewed, had on the show, I've known you for the longest. Ilana (00:03:34): That's pretty cool. Athena (00:03:36): Yeah. Cause I was what, like, 13 or something when we met? Ilana (00:03:39): 13. That's probably right. Athena (00:03:41): So we go way, way back. Ilana (00:03:42): Through many phases. [Athena agrees] Of our personal evolution. [Ilana laughs] Athena (00:03:46): Exactly, Exactly. So, um, so yeah. Ilana, who are you now? Ilana (00:03:52): Who am I now? [Athena laughs] Well, um, I am a filmmaker, a director and screenwriter and um, I'm also a mom, a photographer. I live in Los Angeles. I was born and raised in New York city, and um, I make movies and photographs out here in LA. Athena (00:04:17): Awesome. Ilana (00:04:17): Yeah. Athena (00:04:18): Excellent. So, um, so you know, we talked a little bit before the show just about the idea for Zombified and you know, it's all about like these things that affect our behavior. Things that maybe hijack us, manipulate us without us realizing it. [Ilana agrees] Um, or maybe with us realizing it and, um, movies, the screen. Ilana (00:04:41): Oh boy, the screen Athena (00:04:43): The screen. Ilana (00:04:44): Yes! Athena (00:04:44): It's kind of a big one, isn't it? Ilana (00:04:45): Oh, it's huge. And it's actually something I personally wrestle with it if not daily, multiple times a day. I am confronted with, um, the fact that I'm a media creator, that I actually love movies. I enjoy making things for screen yet I see, um, how the screen has evolved in my lifetime and really just since, um, I don't know, post-college, just everyone has a phone. Um, people are watching movies on their phones. So I've got children where are, who are constantly wanting to be on the screen, [Athena agrees] much like most kids. So I find myself saying, you know, you've got to stop this and I have a keen awareness that people are getting addicted to screens. Meanwhile, I really want everyone to watch my movie [Athena agrees] that's coming out and like, on their screen. [Athena agrees] So yes, I, it's, it's a bit of an uneasy relationship and in some way, when I was a photographer, it was much more simple because photographs are viewed, uh, were viewed traditionally, um, on a wall in a gallery or a museum or in a book. Morally, they were spread much wider to mass audiences through books. Athena (00:06:14): But now it's just content on Instagram. Ilana (00:06:16): Now it's content on Instagram. And that's something I was also never comfortable with. Um, I, I see so many people really giving away their art, a fine trained, uh, fine art trained photographers and artists putting other stuff on Instagram and um, often, and it strikes me as, as just giving away too much, that the immediacy and I, I miss, um, the books. I miss the slowness and miss how art can actually just slow us down and, and I feel like it should slow us down to reflect, and I feel like the mediums of the screens are all about speeding things up. Athena (00:07:04): Oh, that's interesting. So the, the change that you've seen is, is not just like screens sort of invading more and more of our lives, but actually the kind of content on them changing so that it is more sort of fast paced and like [Ilana agrees] grabbing and re-grabbing your attention all the time. Ilana (00:07:26): Exactly. And that as artists perhaps now are expected to just be creating constantly. Um, if you have a, if you have an artist page, you know, or a blog, you have to always be producing. And I know I have several friends who are resisting that because it goes against the nature of their creative process. I mean, there are some people who can just like produce, produce, produce. I mean, even before Instagram, there were painters, you know, painting a week and you know, they were just doing it as this frenetic and you know, maybe they died at 50 of a heart attack. I don't know. [Athena laughs] But, but you know, so much of the creative process I feel could be in danger because we are expected to be so out there and have such a presence and create constantly. [Athena agrees] And I think this will lead me into the whole zombified thing. Athena (00:08:28): Yeah, yeah. Ilana (00:08:29): Because I feel like part of my process is, um, are the days when I just need to take stuff in and have, the input, you know, [Athena agrees] have the inputs coming in and um, that can be from a walk or strangely, the weirdest one is when I go to a mall. Athena (00:08:54): Oh, really? Ilana (00:08:55): Yeah. And it's not to shop, it's not to buy anything. And- Athena (00:08:59): So what do you do when you go to the mall? Ilana (00:09:03): I, I watch people and lately I've been just watching people be on their phones. Athena (00:09:11): Really? Ilana (00:09:11): Yeah. And when, and when, when I see people that aren't, I like make really quick eye contact with them and they look at me and it's almost like we've like picked ourselves out. Like we're the, you know- Athena (00:09:23): The not zombies. Ilana (00:09:23): The not zombies. Yeah. [Athena laughs] We're the survivors. We're the humans. [Everyone laughs] Athena (00:09:28): You survived the smartphone zombie apocalypse. [laughter] Ilana (00:09:31): Right! And that's what it feels like. Like, Oh, okay. There you're in front of, you know, Abercrombie and Fitch waiting for your girlfriend and you're not on your phone. What a weird sight that is. Athena (00:09:42): Hmm. Ilana (00:09:42): Um, but no, there's something about just going to the mall and I don't do this a lot. It's just merely one little function of a day in a possible [Athena agrees] creative day. Um, that's, that's numbing. There's something numbing about them all. That, the lighting and the canned music and the, uh, cheery, the cheeriness of the salespeople, like, I know how to work them. I know how to talk to them to get like certain reactions and not like I'm manipulating them. Athena (00:10:17): Uh-huh. Ilana (00:10:17): But I just feel like it's like a place where I can just like, there are no surprises. Athena (00:10:23): Huh, So what do you, what you, what do you get from that? Like from the numbness of the mall needs a creative process. Ilana (00:10:31): People around me. Um, cause in New York what I would do, I could just walk outside in New York and be around a lot of people and sort of just blend in and just feel like, okay, I'm part of this earth. I'm going to observe. I mean a lot of my writing comes from just watching people and observing, watching mannerisms, listening to how couples talk to each other, sit in a cafe and just observe and listen. And um, here in LA, you know, we're in the Hills here and I see my neighbors, but you know, I might see like a person walking their dog and we talk. That's not my dog. But it's not the crowd. It's not the common. So in town, in so much of America, the commons is, is the mall. And we've got this fake city, I wish I could take you there. Athena (00:11:26): Yeah. Ilana (00:11:26): It's like the simulacrum of a city. It's an outdoor mall with apartments all around the shopping area and fountain and people actually live there, but they're living above like a Barney's co-op or, or you know, Athena (00:11:41): Wow. Ilana (00:11:41): - a Madewell not like the shoemaker, or grocery store. Athena (00:11:49): Right, right. It's mixed. The mixed use thing, Ilana (00:11:51): Right. Athena (00:11:51): But it's like kind of creepily like almost like a Las Vegas version of a city. Ilana (00:11:56): Exactly. And it's high end. It's like, Oh honey, run down to the Mac store and buy me a computer. [Athena laughs] I mean, it's very weird because, [Athena agrees] but, and they, and they pipe in, um, uh, Frank Sinatra music pretty much exclusively. It's really - [Both laugh] Athena (00:12:11): It sounds so creepy. Ilana (00:12:11): And it's outside these apartments. You're listening to this canned music, you're watching thousands of people shopping and it's a high end mall. It's like God, the expensive stores. It's not the highest end. It's not like Gucci, but, [Athena agrees] but the point is, is like, so all these people are walking around just in this haze and they're all made up and dressed in the best clothes that they bought at the mall. [Athena laughs] And so I find this, I don't know, is it comfort I find? No, I don't, I don't know what it is. It's almost like I'm visiting another place. It's so familiar cause I grew up nothing like that. Athena (00:12:52): You're like a mall anthropologist. Ilana (00:12:54): Maybe. Athena (00:12:54): Yeah. [Athena laughs] Ilana (00:12:55): But, for some reason I'm just like, if I'm at odds with what to do and that, or like I've got writer's block or I'm waiting for some tech thing from my editor and I just like, I got to get out of the house and um, sometimes I'll just go [Athena agrees] and, but I do find it, if I'm there too long from the inside part, my head actually starts to hurt the lighting [Athena laughs] and then I start getting like really bummed out. Just seeing everyone on their phone. I can't, you can't stand it. [Everyone laughs] But I use my phone too. Athena (00:13:29): Yeah, right. That's the thing, we- Ilana (00:13:30): I'm not a luddite! Athena (00:13:30): We're all [Ilana agrees] complaining about the screens, but like what would we do without them? Ilana (00:13:38): I know. Athena (00:13:39): Yeah. Ilana (00:13:40): I know. But you know, I was in Joshua Tree this weekend and um, I made a vow. I said, no news and no laptop. And I found myself checking into myself a few times, like just wanting and craving it. But then after a few hours, it ceased. And then by the time I got back here to LA, I didn't want to be on the computer at all. Athena (00:14:07): Yeah. Ilana (00:14:07): And it's like, Oh, okay, we can actually rewire ourselves. We can actually do this. [Athena agrees] It's just a little uncomfortable at first. Athena (00:14:15): Yeah. Yeah. So what do you think it is about screens that like captures our attention, keeps our attention, like you know, how, like what is that process like for a viewer that that gets them engaged in that way? Ilana (00:14:30): Well, I mean, I guess it depends how we're using the screen. Like, I mean, I think with, um, movies and TV and you know, binge watching series, it's just our desire and love of, of narrative and story maybe that we just all love stories and you know, Athena (00:14:50): But you can get that from a book, [Ilana agrees] or text, right? Or listening just to [Ilana agrees] a story, but with screens, it is this other [Ilana agrees] mode of input that just seems to be able to- Ilana (00:15:03): Maybe it's, uh, we want to feel like we're part of something, you know, I don't know. I mean I've put on the radio when I'm cooking because I love the music, but it's also kind of just functions as background music, [Athena agrees] but it's like my local radio station and I feel like I'm part of that community. Um, so maybe when we log on to our social media, I think that's definitely like part of the community and that's something I've, I actually had to actively quit because it took an unhealthy turn a couple of years ago. Um, and I, I've found myself, you know, with my kids in a beautiful spot in Death Valley during some super bloom and I started, you know, taking photographs and making them, and that's something I've been doing forever, practically my whole life. But that wasn't what it was. It was like what I was going to post. And- Athena (00:16:03): I mean, you were like thinking about, "How am I going to capture this for the Instagram?" [Ilana agrees] As opposed to what do I want to capture for myself as an artist? Ilana (00:16:14): Right or what about, and what really got me is like, what about just being there with my kids and just being present and being in the moment? And I realized that I was more living in my virtual world than I was in my actual world. And it was escapism. And I think the screen does that. I think it's something just clicks in our, in our head that, that says, okay, you're, you're in this, you're in this screen right now. You're in this news article, you're in this social media, you're in this message board and it's really hard to stop it. [Athena agrees] And when we do, we can feel actually a physical withdrawal. Like, Ugh, you know, now it's different. Now I'm here in the real world. The real world isn't really that easy sometimes. Um, and this, you know, our screens are easy. We can totally manipulate it. If we don't like what someone's saying, don't ever have to follow them. Athena (00:17:13): So it's a little more controllable [Ilana agrees] than actual world around us. Ilana (00:17:17): It's absolutely more controllable. But, but interestingly, I've found that, um, I stopped, I quit Facebook and I went private on Instagram, which immediately like just really mellowed it out. I post every six months on it and maybe check every now and then. But, um, that it actually helped me, um, in my life in ways that I can't even measure at this point in terms of focus and clarity and just being present. Athena (00:17:51): Yeah. Ilana (00:17:52): Being present in the moment and not wanting to escape the moment, [Athena agrees] you know? And I think that we can, there's so many ways this culture gives us to zone out, to block out the feelings. Um, screens are, are probably the most insidious, but maybe alcohol and drugs are worse. [Ilana laughs] Because they actually have- [Athena agrees] And also I, I stopped all of that. I mean, I've, um, haven't had any intoxicants since, I don't know, a couple months after I quit Facebook. So I can't, and I feel great. I've never felt better and more present in my life. Athena (00:18:32): Hmm. Ilana (00:18:32): And I realized that, um, it wasn't like there were any, um, horrible bottom issues. It wasn't like, you know, you hear tales of, you know, drug abuse and alcohol wasn't anything like that. But I realized like, wow, I'm actually not present. Like why do I need to have that glass of wine? Why do I need to partake in this or that at a party? [Athena agrees] Um, why can't I just enjoy it right now? Or why can't I be okay with feeling sad or having a stressful day and just know that that's going to pass through too. Athena (00:19:10): yeah, it's sort of like a mindfulness practice. Ilana (00:19:12): Absolutely. Athena (00:19:13): Yeah. Ilana (00:19:13): But it's weird cause now that, you know, when I think about the order of things, I sometimes wonder if if one would have been possible, wouldn't have been possible without the other or they go hand in hand, you know, which things like quitting social media. Athena (00:19:33): Oh, right. And quit drinking. Ilana (00:19:36): Right, cause it all takes you away from the present and then, and um, I dunno. They both kind of capture your attention that capture your money. [Athena agrees] They capture, they're taking a piece of your bandwidth. They're taking a piece of your bandwidth. [Athena agrees] Yeah. Your privacy. Athena (00:19:56): Yeah, so do you think there's something special about like the visual images, like whether they're photos or, you know, moving pictures, films. Like is that a special category of things that we get on a, on a screen? Does it have special properties when it comes to our attention? Ilana (00:20:16): Probably. I mean, I think, you know, there are, it's funny when you look at what goes viral, like it could be like a five second clip of what you said, the dancing alien baby- [Everyone laughs]. Athena (00:20:28): Yeah, something like that. Ilana (00:20:32): And just like, huh, that's really fascinating that that could have 400,000 people watching that over and over again. [Athena laughs] And like, why is this so wonderful? Um, I think, again, I think that's something that might just be innately like part of us. I mean, think of like some of the first photographs that ever were, you know, the horse, you know, showing the horse galloping- Athena (00:20:56): Uh-huh. Ilana (00:20:56): -where you could for the first time, see that all the feet were off the ground. [Athena agrees] You know, the Moy bridge or certain, um, you know, early photography or certain trick photography people were fascinated by. So maybe there's just an element of novelty to it that we're all like, Oh, look at that. Um, there's probably some Freud in it too. Just like, Oh look, that guy just fell down his stairs and his pants came down and, [Everyone laughs] you know, like, why is that shared half a million times? [Both laugh] You know? Um, so yeah, I think people, it's easy. Athena (00:21:36): Yeah. And we're also just like really visual beings, right? We like [Ilana agrees] we asses, a lot of information- Ilana (00:21:41): Totally. Athena (00:21:41): -through our eyes and, and I mean, that kind of then makes sense that if you can create something that attracts visual attention, then that's going to be, it's gonna be hard to, hard to, you know, remove yourself from that. Especially because like, you know, if, if there's something moving, like, I don't know, I kind of think of it from an evolutionary perspective. Like, you know, our ancestors, they're on the savannas of Africa or whatever. If there's something moving, like, you should probably attend to it, it might be fitness relevant, right? [Ilana agrees] It could be a predator. It could be, um, something you could eat. It could be, you know, another human [Ilana agrees] that is coming to do you harm or, um, try to have a positive interaction with you. Or it could be your, your child like there. [Ilana agrees] You know, if things were moving and in your visual field, they probably sort of deserved attention in terms of like being relevant to you. Ilana (00:22:40): Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. And I think it's also just, I mean, I don't know what to make of all this talk of how our attention span is getting shorter. Um, again, I think that that's kind of learned- Athena (00:22:54): Hmm. Ilana (00:22:54): -in a way. Like we're, we're allowing it to happen and it's like, this is- Athena (00:23:00): So like, what has happened in terms of film? Like have there actually been like quantifiable changes in the, you know, the cuts? Ilana (00:23:08): Hmm. Athena (00:23:08): And like the, you know, the speeding up of things. Is that? [Ilana agrees] Maybe you can give a little background on that. Ilana (00:23:14): Sure. Well, I mean, I can't speak for the, you know, entire history of cinema right now, but, but over time has especially sped up recently, um, on the timeline filmmaking, uh, yeah. Edits have gotten a lot faster. Um, there's a lot more. Um, there's a lot, well, certain types of films, there's a lot more explosions. Um, the pacing is faster. They've also gotten incredibly violent and visually so, um, obviously not all cinema, but even just like say just like a romantic comedy made now compared to say 30 years ago, you're going to have a montage with like lots of rapid cuts and you know, just, you know, a series of shots. Montages, you know, that are just rapid fire. Um, and I don't know exactly who decided that that has to be cause it used to be just an effective film technique to kind of grab someone's attention. But now it almost seems like it's the de facto technique. And, um, I was, you know, in terms of science fiction, um, that's really the, my genre that I love the most and um, made few films and made a thriller film, a feature called Perception, um, where we deal with things that are not of this world. Um, we've just suspended some disbelief and I am influenced greatly by some older films and some European films where it is slightly slower. Where you don't have to have, you know, crazy fast cuts and Rapids and booms and you know, sound effects that are just like blasting the viewer because I feel like that that can be, um, really just distracting and also pandering. Athena (00:25:21): It seems like also, you know, if a movie is cut so fast, it's almost like as a viewer you don't have any bandwidth to be processing [Ilana agrees] what you're seeing and what you're feeling with it. Ilana (00:25:34): No, it's like a video game basically. [Athena agrees] I mean, I took, um, my teenage son to see 2001 on the screen at the Santa Monica, uh, theater there had a remastered cut and I've taken him to see several films and you know, he's a teen boy and he's, he really, I was a little concerned. I was like, I really wonder what he's going to think of this because it's so beautiful. It's so slow. And um, he really liked it. Athena (00:26:06): And you're like, phew. [Both laugh] Ilana (00:26:08): Yeah, He liked it. But he also really likes, you know, the transformers and he likes mad max. And so, but then he also liked Arrival, which is another slow paced. And you know, there's no- Athena (00:26:24): Very thoughtful. Ilana (00:26:25): Thought, this thoughtful and there's no war at the end where earth is obliterated. I mean I love those films too. That's just like brain candy and eye candy to me. I mean the thing, so I, I, I feel, I guess my point in bringing up him was that I don't know why they feel like that's the only way to make a movie these days- Athena (00:26:47): Hmm. Ilana (00:26:47): -when clearly there are people who can appreciate slower paced, thoughtful things. And I feel like if we just keep this up, I mean I saw End Game the other day with them and at one point I had to like close my eyes and look down. There were so many things on fire, I lost track. [Athena laughs] I was like, what the hell? I was like, is the theater on fire? [Athena laughs] I mean, it was just so much! And it didn't have to be that way. So, I don't know why I, it makes me, it gets me a little frustrated that all this content is being put out there and we're constantly being told like it has to, you know, this is just the way it is. It's fast cut violence, sex, you know bleh. But it's like you're, they're just assuming that that's what everyone even teenage boys want and it's not necessarily true. [Athena agrees] There's manipulation going on and I don't know what the end is like what, what they have to gain by making films like that. Athena (00:27:55): Yeah. Well I mean it certainly does sort of just play into this. Like there should never be a dull moment where you're not being stimulated with something, which is part of the whole like smartphones, social media, checking this and checking that there's like no downtime. Right? Like if you are waiting in line for the bathroom or somebody that you're having dinner with gets up to go to the bathroom. Like, you know, I do it, I vote, take out my phone and I'll be like, why am I doing that? How come? I can't just sit there and be like, I have a moment to consider and enjoy where I am and be with my own thoughts. Ilana (00:28:37): But, well, right and why, why can't we just be with our own thoughts? [Athena agrees] What are we scared of? Why, why it is a habit. It's a reflex and it's, it's, I don't know, I feel like the awareness that we have of that is the first step. And I know more and more people are becoming aware because it doesn't feel good. I actually feel like we're at a new, I think we're at an awakening of sorts and I think this is the beginning of a new era of, of um, awareness that people are being hooked into these devices. I don't think it's gone mainstream yet. Yeah. But, um, it's definitely happening. I mean, I'm having more and more conversations like this. I mean, my dear friend, she's a neurologist and um, you know, she sat, we sat down across the table from each other in December and she was like, I really need to figure out how to stop this. Yep. And she was as serious as anything. She, you know, and I was like, well, let's come up with a plan. Let's figure out how we can stop that. She goes a minute, I'm news, I'm scrolling the New York times at 11:00 PM in bed. I'm like, well why would you do that? That's like asking for trouble. But you know, people serious, people are realizing that we are part of what's perhaps the biggest brainwashing experiment on planet earth ever. Athena (00:30:14): Wow. Ilana (00:30:15): I honestly believe that. I really feel so. Athena (00:30:19): So what do you, what do you think is going on like that is leading to, to the mass scale of it? Like what's, is it just, uh, the business interest behind social media? Ilana (00:30:31): I think the money. I think the algorithms took over and um, the algorithms were built on engagement and they were built on eyeballs being on the screen as long as possible. Cause that's what sells. That's what sells the ads and the ads came in and, um, that's how they make their money. So, you know, the, the part that really spooked me, and this happened, um, I think right before I decided to quit were when it came out that Facebook was doing those psychological experiments with people's newsfeeds. They would plant psychologically disturbing articles and then they would click them or they then they'd gauge their responses and then they'd see what would happen. Like, well, what's, where will that lead them? And then if you're in a heightened state of stress or distress, you are more likely to buy something that will help you feel better or maybe, you know, post some, some other type of content that leads somewhere else. So just the, the, the notion that they were doing these experiments, like I can't believe more, I can't believe like a billion people didn't quit seriously after hearing that, that is so messed up and I'm really like, they're bad actors in our brains. Athena (00:32:03): Right. And we just happened to allow our brains to get hooked up to our devices in such a way that they can poke our brains. Ilana (00:32:11): Like they're poking the brands and they're, they're seeing what you scroll on. I mean, even Netflix, when I'm watching something on Netflix, I read that there are people that analyze where you stop, where you pause your, your film or TV show, they, they know, which shows you don't finish watching. They know at what point in time they know how to start a film. They know how to, what to put in the middle. It's all graphed out for, for engagement. Every single thing is mapped out and they're tracking you. So obviously I'm okay with a certain amount of tracking cause like I do enjoy Netflix. I mean I just finished watching, uh, all of Star Trek, Next Generation with CarMax on it. And that was my second time watching. And then we also watch Voyager. So this took place over a couple of years. Uh, we watched every episode together and it was a bonding, wonderful thing. So like I, I am so grateful for Netflix for that. So I'm not like trying to, I'm not doing a bashing of technology. [Athena agrees] So I accept that they know very well that this is a scifi family, [Athena agrees] you know, so the choices that come up on my account like are as different as you could imagine from say my friend in New York who watches, you know, documentaries about obscure Danish artists. I saw her account, I was like, this is Netflix? Like what are these shows? What are these films like? They would never show up on my feed. [Athena agrees] Athena (00:33:54): Well and I mean on first pass, right, that's good because you get to see the things [Ilana agrees] that you're more likely to want to watch. [Ilana agrees] Then it does, you know it, it does just feed into this whole like echo chamber kind of thing where you end up, you know, showing that you're potentially part of a, a group that like these kinds of things and you're just like grouped [Ilana agrees] with all of them. And then you stopped seeing as much of the world, [Ilana agrees] you've showed that you have preferences for seeing only certain parts of the world. And then the algorithms show you the parts of the world that you've indicated you would rather see. Ilana (00:34:32): Exactly. It's a bit of a trap, [Athena agrees] but I guess I could just find out a name of some, you know, strange film that whatever, you know, and then get a new feed. But yeah, no, it's so, it's, it's weird. But you have the manipulation. I mean, I, one thing I tell my boy is that I say, you know, these companies make money on hooking you. Um, and you know, when it comes to cigarettes, they did that with, when I was a kid, there were still like cartoon ads for cigarettes cause they knew, well, you know, like that camel and Joe camel and couple of others. And they were marketing because they knew they had to hook the children, the teenagers to create lifelong customers and addicts. And it worked. So then, you know, it came, stepped in with, you know, some regulations. But the same is true for cigarettes, vaping, alcohol and social media where technology really, they make money on hooking you. And um, I mean I'm hooked. I'm an Apple customer. I've like synched my- Athena (00:35:50): - life [Athena laughs]. Ilana (00:35:55): -devices. Right! You know, "Hello Skynet," you know, but, um, I love the machine. It's a great operating system. [Athena agrees] It works for me. Um, you know, I do editing on it. It's just perfect. So like I said, it's, there's this uneasy tension I have, but I guess I'm just doing what I can to not be, you know, uh, a zombie [Ilana laughs], you know, to not be the person at the mall. Like with my head down like that looking cause I have 30 seconds before the person I'm meeting shows up. Athena (00:36:30): So how does this like, affect or feed into your process as a filmmaker? Like this, you know, changing relationship with screens that has been happening, like for you personally, but also you seeing it more generally in the people around you over time? Like does it affect how you approach your work or? Ilana (00:36:53): Not really, no, I mean, I mean, I guess when I'm in like full writing mode, um, and you know, I'm, I'm writing on the screen so my face is there all the time. Uh, likewise, if I'm, uh, in an edit session or even on set, they're surrounded by cameras and screens. So I feel it's like, I love it. Like that, that whole part of it. These are useful tools and, uh, that I can get my work done and I feel great affection towards the machines and the technology. And this film I made back in, um, called, We Are All Cylons. Um, I, it's about AI and our relationship to it and our evolution as humans. Uh, as we enter this new, uh, era basically, um, the advent of AI and programming, um, that I put myself in the mindset of a computer in order to edit the film. Athena (00:38:03): Really? Ilana (00:38:03): Yeah. I pretended I was an artificial intelligence. And how would an AI tackle this material that dealt with, um, you know, characters in a show thinking, believing they were human, but then actually finding out they were machines. So I was really fascinated with the overlap of, of, you know, being sentient being, you know, where, where does that line happen? When is it going to happen with machines? Athena (00:38:34): Well, and there's all this stuff about like the predictive technology, right? So if you are typing things in Google, like Google can guess what your next, you know, word is going to be. And like if you're like typing texts and I know there's like some setting you can turn on that'll, like auto failure texts. Ilana (00:38:54): Have you found that it's helpful? Athena (00:38:56): No I just, I turn all that stuff off just cause it creeps me out. Like I would rather type a little bit more. Yeah, it just, yeah. But there, I think there's this really interesting question of like, well you know, if your, your sentences are getting auto-filled like are you deciding what you're writing or is the algorithm deciding what you're writing? So. Ilana (00:39:24): I would say it's the algorithm. [Athena laughs] Athena (00:39:26): So then like right, how much of us is like becoming a robot [Ilana agrees] or you know, algorithm that is not in our brains. If we have outsourced a lot of things to our devices, Ilana (00:39:42): Well, it's definitely the early part of the fusion process for sure. [Athena laughs] It's right there. But you know, when you think about it that it's some tech bro and you know, San Francisco that's writing this algorithm, that makes me uneasy too. Like who the hell is he to be telling me "Thanks! Got the email, exclamation point!" right? [Athena laughs] Like what? I didn't write that. That is not, it's not my voice. Athena (00:40:07): But then if they can like scan all your emails and figure out responses that would be in your voice then? Ilana (00:40:14): Yeah. Athena (00:40:14): Is that better or worse? Ilana (00:40:15): Well, I think that [Athena laughs] they're all, it's probably worse. I mean they, I think they are capitalizing on the fact that we like the path of least resistance for the most part. I mean, I've toyed with the idea for sure of like getting a Tor browser. My husband uses that. Sometimes I'm getting this email, I don't remember the name of it, but it's a server that's like totally private and you know, they, no spying, but you need to set it up then you need to email, you know, 500,000 people. They already have your old email account. You know, it's like switching from a big bank to a credit union in my dreams. I'm like, yeah, one day I'll get rid of Wells Fargo, those bastards. But oh gosh, what a pain in the ass. Athena (00:41:08): So, you know, the friction. Ilana (00:41:13): Right? So then we find ourselves kind of just gliding through being like, Hey, I'm all right with that. Not all right. With that there, I'm going to draw the line. So I guess we just draw, where do we draw the lines? Are we hypocrites if we, if we're a vegan but we still bank with Wells Fargo. [Athena laughs] I mean, I mean, [Ilana laughs] you know, I don't know. Athena (00:41:36): Yeah, well it is, it is hard to, you know, find the path through that like lets us have the benefits of technology and there are a lot, like there are so many amazing things that we can do [Ilana agrees] with our electronic devices and algorithms. I mean it is literally, you know, the power of information and decision making. Right? And so obviously we don't want to give all of that up and you know, go and live off the grid. Ilana (00:42:09): No. Athena (00:42:09): But then how do you take those things that are positive and keep them in your life or incorporate them in your life but - Ilana (00:42:16): Control. [Athena agrees] They need to be controlled. I mean, I love my phone for mostly for the utilities that I have on it. I have got a um, scope on my phone where it's like a view finder, that, that will show me what a shot looks like. It's a, it's an app. I mean, it was not cheap. It was probably, I don't remember, but, um, $20 or something, which I guess for apps is kind of- Athena (00:42:48): Pricey, yeah. Ilana (00:42:48): -but my gosh, now my phone is like this amazing view finder. Athena (00:42:53): Hmm. Ilana (00:42:53): And that's incredible to me. [Athena agrees] And I love that. And I've got this amazing weather app where, you know, it's like satellite mapping and so I don't know, we just find that and just maybe start thinking of the phone addiction as we would any other addiction. Like would you be shoveling, you know, hot fudge sundaes in your face 20 times a day? Probably not. Would you be drinking, you know, bottle of vodka 17 times a day? Probably not. You know, the bathroom check take on my vodka, but seriously, maybe we have to start thinking maybe we have to really start nurturing our mental health and our presence and our awareness the same way we would not eat like tons of junk food or we tried to get enough sleep or you know, I mean like really start thinking of the phone as a tool and not something that is just- Athena (00:43:57): It's like a comfort, like a, it's like a, you know, you pick it up and the moment you pick it up you are no longer having to deal with whatever is going on for you and you're just like, oh, the screen is shining back at me. Ilana (00:44:15): Right. Like, why would we be so bored? It's so easily as a, as a people, why? And isn't it okay to be bored? Isn't it okay to just, just even be uneasy? Like just like if we just stopped sooner. Okay. Yeah. What am I gonna think right now? What am I going to do? [Athena laughs] Just like let that just course through us. Just, you know, just take a breath I think. I think if more people, maybe just, and I'm not saying I have all the answers, I pick up my phone a hell of a lot too. But what I try to do just sometimes just take a breath. And that's almost enough to just say, okay, don't have to give into this craving right now. Yeah. I don't have to. [Athena agrees] Athena (00:45:06): And that becomes scary thinking about like, if kids are growing up without learning how to regulate that and they have the access to that immediate gratification of the screen all the time. Like I'm, I mean, I'm guessing it's harder to stop with that, you know, that like knowledge that, you know, internalized sense that like, it can be okay to be by yourself and without a screen for- Ilana (00:45:39): And just to teach kids, um, other ways to self-soothe, you know, um, that they don't need the validation of a like on social media that they don't need to see what's happening right now. It's not soothing. It actually causes grief and depression, you know, over time and the comparing and stuff, you know, that taking a walk, having some, having a tea, take a bath. I mean, you know, obviously scaled to kids of different ages, but, um, yeah, because I, I feel like there's, um, a potential to obliterate the moment with, with something that's out there and then we're robbing ourselves actually of being present and of just being in the world. Athena (00:46:39): Yeah. It's almost like you, you take FOMO, right? Fear of missing out and you turn it on its head. So it's like, well, you know, maybe it's not so much the fear of missing out of like something out there, but it's the fear of like missing out on the moment that you're actually in. [Ilana agrees] The present that you are occupying right now. Ilana (00:47:00): Yeah, absolutely. And I also say, I don't know what happened, where people equated like having lots of outside approval was something that they needed. Um, you know, I feel like there's a bit of a tyranny of numbers that's happening that people say, Oh, well I only got this much attention that these many likes and that's enough. And it's like, okay, now when I'm in the desert and there're blooms, I'll take a picture of my child with, you know, in the desert and send it to maybe the two or three people that I know actually. Truly. That would love to see pictures of him. Athena (00:47:48): Yeah. Right. Ilana (00:47:48): You know, and that's really satisfying. That's enough. There was a time not long ago where that picture would have gone up on a site where I had hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of friends, you know? Athena (00:48:04): Yeah. Ilana (00:48:05): That was on Facebook and I really wanted everyone to see that. So why, you know, what, what happened? I mean is it just as simple as like, we, so many people want to get to be famous. I mean, I don't know. I don't know. There's like a shift like, well- Athena (00:48:22): Yeah, well, you know, as humans like we are inherently really social and it's easy to like get us pulled into sort of status competition. Right. And like, you know who's the best and who gets the most and like it's just easy to like get sucked into that. [Ilana agrees] And I think, you know, Facebook and a lot of the other platforms they have, you know, both of those things they have like they're the channel where your friends are. Um, so that whole like the social approval thing, like you can get that there and you know, you can see how much other people's stuff is liked and feel competitive. You know, about who has more sponsors or followed more. Ilana (00:49:07): But it's a lie. But it's all a lie. That's the thing. I mean it's not all a lie, but a good chunk of it is, I mean, I know this couple, this, you know, these two women: married, friends, and have a baby and all that and they're posting photos, love, oh, we love each other. I mean just like the sappiest, most beautiful pictures of the three of them. And then I find out they had this like bitter, horrible breakup, divorce, custody battle while they're still posting these photos. Athena (00:49:39): Wow. Ilana (00:49:39): So when I heard that, I was like, well I, that is like something so beyond my comprehension in terms of like living a life in public. [Athena agrees] You know, I just don't, I don't know. I mean, I guess I should probably also say one reason I did also fall away from all that and quit was because I was getting, I got some bad attention from a very sick person who threatened me and my family. Athena (00:50:11): Oh my gosh. Ilana (00:50:13): Um, through Facebook and he had seen some of my films and it was someone we were once friends with, but you know, we had to stop seeing him obviously, but he tracked me down in many ways and like kept creating fake profiles and yeah. And it- Athena (00:50:33): Wow that's creepy. Ilana (00:50:34): It was so creepy and it just, um, I mean I would've stopped anyway, but that really underscored it in the sense of, um, just feeling like, well, what am I doing? Why, why would I put my picture of my kid up if there's a person out there [Athena agrees] that's like knows who we are and you know, and I think of, you know, there are a lot of vulnerable people out there, you know, who are probably off it for the same reason. Athena (00:51:07): Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have a, um, an opinion or a perspective on like all of the like YouTubeing? Like the YouTubers, like the people who- Ilana (00:51:21): I don't, I don't know. I mean, only in the sense that I, I see that my kids like watching people play video games and talk about them, which is just like a whole other level that they like to play video games. But they also really like to watch people have massive commentary and some of these kids or young adults. They've got like a million or so followers and they're making so much money on their YouTube ads. So I don't know, I find it funny and ridiculous, but again, YouTube with their algorithms, they, they show you increasingly crazy stuff. Like when Apollo was um, young, he was into Thomas the tank engine and, uh, be like, oh, Apollo, what are you watching? And you, you know, you'd see top him hat and the train and the blue face. And then I'd go into the kitchen, then I'd come back later and if just a few minutes he's watching a live video of a train intersecting, smashing a car and someone dying. And I was like- Athena (00:52:29): What? Ilana (00:52:29): And I was like, oh boy. Okay. Yeah. And then for Mac the other day said that, you know, it was like leading him to some, you know, white supremacist videos like, because he had typed in some sort of, you know, Tae Kwon Do thing or something, but it was just like two leaps away from the worst possible thing to like get the viewer pumped up. So, you know, there's the other algorithm, but in terms of the people, the YouTube stars, I, I don't have enough bandwidth for that. Athena (00:53:07): Yeah. Ilana (00:53:07): Why? What do you think? Athena (00:53:08): I don't know. I mean, to me it's interesting because like on one hand you have all these people who, you know, are good performers in one way or another, right. But like now have a way of, you know, reaching people and people I think are wanting a sort of more of like a personal connection and in a way, you know, they're getting that from these YouTube channels. But then on the other hand, like, you know, basically all these people who are doing this, they're creating content so that YouTube can make money off of the ads. Right? I mean they're, they're getting money for the ad, the, you know, people who are producing the content and getting money for the ads. Right. But YouTube is getting their cut of that too. And YouTube is really benefiting from the content that is being produced. I mean, sort of for free. I mean I know they get ad revenues, but there are a lot of people who are producing content and not getting anything. So I don't know, it just seems like there's a whole different world of like how content is getting made and consumed. Ilana (00:54:17): Definitely. And it's very personal and people are blogging their personal lives and their stories and, and, and I wonder, it's like where did the technology bring that out in people or was it always something we would just needed to do? And once the technology appeared for like finally we get to, yeah- Athena (00:54:38): Well I think, you know, people do have a deep need to connect to each other and hear each other's voices [Ilana agrees], see each other's faces talking and like- Ilana (00:54:46): Oh, I think it can be really positive, especially if you've liked some role models or like people who are say, have like a, you know, a positive coming out story that can really help a kid who's lonely and doesn't know what to do. Um, I think there, I mean, I've watched YouTube videos on how to like, you know, fix my voltage regulator. Athena (00:55:10): It's amazing, right? [Ilana agrees] All of that information is available online. Like you can, I mean, fix everything right with a four minute YouTube video. It's kind of astounding. Ilana (00:55:22): No, it's amazing. So, yeah, I don't know. I mean, I see here in Hollywood, there is, um, so many people who, who still come to this town to, to make it big, and now there's this apartment building not far from here. 1600 fine. Actually that's filled with YouTube stars. Athena (00:55:44): Really? Ilana (00:55:44): Yeah. Yeah. Like you should go check it out. They all like live there. Athena (00:55:49): They just all flock there? Ilana (00:55:50): Yeah, I'm not so sure. There might be some agency that, you know there's some agencies that represent these people now cause they make a lot of money. So maybe just they put them there. They have but, but the point is it's like it's just another layer of, of the business now- Athena (00:56:09): Hmm. Ilana (00:56:09): -that's you know, but most of them probably want like their own actual TV show or movie. Would leave YouTube in a hot second if that offer came around. Athena (00:56:23): Hmm. Yeah. It's interesting. There are like I heard from a friend of mine who went to a, um, I think it was a junior high for like a career day and she's a professor and you know, she came to, you know like talk about being a professor. Ilana (00:56:38): Yeah. [Ilana laughs] Athena (00:56:38): All the kids wanted to talk about was like how when they grow up they want to be a YouTuber and an influencer and like that. That's like what they're aspiring to. And- Ilana (00:56:52): How old were they? Athena (00:56:53): I think they were in middle school. Ilana (00:56:55): Oh, hopefully they'll grow out of that. [Athena agrees] That's an influencer. Yeah. I don't even know how those people get away with it. I thought you had to announce it. You're making an advertisement, but they, I don't know why people trust influencers if they're getting paid to endorse a product that they, yeah. Athena (00:57:13): Well, apparently, um, influencers like in order to get to the point where you're getting paid, like, I mean, you have to go through a long time where you're not getting paid. You're just, maybe you get some free stuff or you get a free ticket- Ilana (00:57:28): Right Athena (00:57:29): Yeah. And you cultivate your following and- Ilana (00:57:32): Yeah. There's some article, there’s resorts down all over the world are like complaining how so many people are calling them, asking them for free rooms, claiming their influencers- Athena (00:57:43): Wow. Ilana (00:57:43): People with just like, you know, like a thousand people following them. That's not enough. You're not getting a free room. Athena (00:57:52): Wow. Yeah. And how many of them are bots actually, right? Like you don't know. Ilana (00:57:56): Right, exactly. Yeah. Bots for sure. Athena (00:57:59): Yeah. Yeah. So, um, can you tell us a little bit about your new movie? Ilana (00:58:06): Sure. Yeah. Um, well, it's called Perception. It's a psychological thriller and it involves a, uh, it's about a real estate developer who is trying to reconnect with his dead wife and he encounters a storefront psychic, um, because he's in a strip mall that he's, uh, redeveloping. So knocking it down and they have a chance encounter and, uh, then they get involved, um, once she starts doing a reading for him. So it's supernatural, spooky that I'm very much into, um, alternate realities and presenting, um, work that deals with more than we can see on a daily basis. Athena (00:58:59): Things that you don't usually have coming into your visual field like you like to put them on a screen. I mean, and then- Ilana (00:59:07): Yeah, and, and you know, and just, I'm fascinated with, um, the different levels of perception. Well, the name is Perception, but that, that we all have them and how we can actually decide how big or small we want our world to be based on our beliefs. Athena (00:59:32): Hmm. Ilana (00:59:32): And, um, you know, there's some people that truly believe they, that um, there are clairvoyants, that there are psychics, that there are people who have the ability to, to tell the future to, you know, intuit certain things or reach a spirit world. And there's some people who are just absolutely debunk that. And I do believe that there is a spectrum of talents and gifts that we humans have. And I do believe that psychic power is just as an umbrella is something that can be gifted down as well as, uh, nurtured and brought through. But I also know for a fact that like 95% of the people out there who claim they are, are probably not and they just might have like really good intuition or they just might really know how to talk to people. So I wanted to make a film where we explore both sides where we could see where we could present it and let the people at the audience come with their own very strong beliefs. Because usually people have some sort of strong feeling about the topic and then figure out what we're trying to do here with the film. Athena (01:00:51): Hmm. So that, that's interesting. And, um, the, this whole question of like, you know, what really does it mean when someone like claims to be psychic or like says that they, you know, have the ability to see things or perceive things that other people don't perceive? [Ilana agrees] And I think, uh, I mean there is just a really interesting question of like, you know, if you, if you posit that there's just a range of perceptual abilities that, that people have and some people are able to pick up on more things than others or integrate your information than others, then it seems like there's a lot of things that could look like clairvoyance. Ilana (01:01:34): There is! Athena (01:01:34): But there it's really just about taking information from different places and bringing it together. Ilana (01:01:40): Absolutely. Athena (01:01:41): But other people might not believe- Ilana (01:01:41): And that ties back into being present and being in the moment and, and listening. People take it, take it for granted. I mean, it's, it's one of the most important skills we have as, as humans, as communicators, is to actually listen to what someone else is saying. And I think, um, I, I know we actually have someone who is an actual energy reader and he plays himself in the film and I've had done energy readings with him and it's a skill that he has developed over the past 25 years and he does it. Athena (01:02:20): What does that mean exactly to be an energy reader? Ilana (01:02:22): Sure. Well, it means that he is seeing he's, he's basically seeing you on an energetic level in the sense of, you know, I think he sees a lot in colors. Um, whilst he doesn't use the word chakra and he's also like super anti new-age-y. He's just so down to earth and- Athena (01:02:51): Alright. [Athena laughs]. Ilana (01:02:51): Anyway. Um, I mean, I don't want to- Athena (01:02:54): So you have a non-new-age-y person [Ilana agrees] who does energy reading. Ilana (01:02:59): Yes. Athena (01:02:59): And has been- Ilana (01:03:00): And he plays a twisted version of himself in the film. Athena (01:03:03): Nice. Ilana (01:03:03): So he plays more of a scammer and all that. Athena (01:03:07): Alright. Ilana (01:03:07): So not that, but, but so just this idea that, you know, um, here, okay, you walk into a room at a party, right? Let's say it's like a small party. Let's say it's 15 people. You walk in and there are 15 people in a room, you pretty much immediately pick up on the vibe of the room. Like what's happening in this room? [Athena agrees] Is it filled with like serious, good natured conversations where there's like good witty repartee [Athena laughs] and you know like some chuckles and you're like, okay, this is a room I want to be in. Or was there some like kind of resentment going on? Maybe there's just like, people are really awkward, they're standing, you feel it. [Athena agrees] You might not even like hear anything but like you feel the energy of the room, right? [Athena agrees] Or like a tense board meeting or you know, right. You've been in those situations where you just feel it. So that's what he's honed. But he does it on an individual level. He feels, he knows. So like he knows if you're dealing with some relationship issue or because there's something that you're emitting that's that it's coming out of the heart. You really have to let him explain this. But this is my, just as someone who's been "read by him," so, so I know it's possible and I know myself that when I'm in a, you know, in a zone, in a good zone, maybe creative ideas are gonna come more and I'm walking outside and out of the corner of my eye I'll see my dad walk down the street. My dad's been, my dad's been dead for 11 years, you know, and I'll see him and I'll say, okay, logically that's not my dad. Athena (01:05:06): But your brain is taking these ambiguous cues and kind of interpreting it [Ilana agrees] as someone who's similar height or has a gate or whatever. Ilana (01:05:16): But then also like, why is my dad appearing to me now? Like is there a message? Like, am I like, what's the message? Maybe it's time for me to ask a question, [Athena agrees] So I'll just ask him a question, you know, or I'll just say hi or I'll cry or you know, I mean, any number of things. So it's like, that's what I mean. If we just stop and we're like, what's around me? What's happening? It's not all solid. It's not all green couch, wood window. Like I feel these things, I see these things. But you know, what's this space between you and me right here? Like if I look hard enough, it almost starts to kind of look like TV static a little. Athena (01:05:59): Yeah. Well, and that's, I mean our, it's because our brains are part of right. Like everything we see and we touch and we interact with, like we're seeing our brain's interpretation of that and that means that we are bringing things to the table every time [Ilana agrees] we have any perceptual event or not bringing things to the table. Ilana (01:06:19): Right. Like so true. Yeah, bring everything to the table. Yeah. I mean, you know, you, you live in Arizona, so you obviously have great nights skies. And in my time, the year I spent writing in Arizona in the Northern desert is writing a science fiction film there. And I would lay outside and um, let my eyes adjust and then wait, and then I would start seeing things in that sky that you don't just see if you're like, oh yeah, look, yeah, I mean it would start filling up. [Athena agrees] It would start filling up with stars and then I'd see shooting stars and I'd see red comments with orange tails and I'd see and I was like, was that a UFO? I understand why people see those things now. [Both laugh] I understand. Yeah. Athena (01:07:09): Yeah. Well, and you know, if there are things that are important to us and things from the past that are important to us, like you know, seeing your dad or you want to believe that there's life out there, [Ilana agrees] you know, for one reason or another. Yeah. Then our brain projects those things [Ilana agrees] onto what the information that's coming in, right? Ilana (01:07:30): Right. Athena (01:07:31): Like, like every stage of our perception are like there are, you know, sort of these decisions being made [Ilana agrees] about how it's going to get interpreted and depending what our priors are going in, what we think we're going to see or where we are emotionally. Like it changes. Ilana (01:07:47): Totally where we are emotionally- Athena (01:07:50): And what actually gets to our brain in terms of the neural signals. Ilana (01:07:54): Exactly. And I don't like when people shut that down. I don't like when other people say there’s no such thing as ghosts or UFOs or it's like, okay, you know, I get it. Not everything that, that, you know, you can't always expect to have everything be scientifically proven. I mean, I love hearing explanations from physicists that, you know, we can't be alone in the universe. You know, mathematically they'll say we can't be so, but, but you know, and all the funny stuff in the paranormal shows where the ghost hunters or whatever, you know, I mean that's all it's- but I, I guess it's, it's bigger than that. It's bigger than like refuting someone claiming they see a ghost or UFO or believe they can see the future, whatever. Because to that person it's real and it's meaningful and that makes their world bigger. Athena (01:08:58): Hmm. Ilana (01:08:58): And I'm all about making our worlds bigger and not smaller because when our worlds are bigger, when we're open to stuff that we can't necessarily see or touch or smell, um, I think that that leads to compassion and understanding. Athena (01:09:18): So sort of just being more open to the possibility of the world of [Ilana agrees] not just our world, but everything that was possible. Ilana (01:09:25): And also be open to what other people believe. Like, let that person, as long as it's not hurting anyone else. That's the main thing. [Athena agrees] Like if it's someone's fanatic religion where they believe something and believe in murdering people or oppressing people, I'm not down with that. But if it's like, okay, you believe that, you know, this boat landed came down with the savior and whatever, you know, believe it, fine. Or if you believe certain things, I'm, who am I to say that what you're believing is not right? I don't know. I mean it ties into a bit with my mother who has, er, had, um, Alzheimers, you know, she believed very much what was happening to her on a daily basis. So she'd be present and talk with me and you know, we'd be like, how's your lunch? How's the tuna salad sandwich and shit. You know, it's delicious. It's lovely. I love this meal. And she said, well, you know, Joyce Joyce, she really, she messed up with the party the other night because, you know, I told her not to serve the chicken and you know, Joyce has been dead for 20 years. There was no party last night, you know, so, but she was there- Athena (01:10:47): Something was getting aggravated in her memories and so- Ilana (01:10:50): She believed that that party happened last night and she was telling me, so it took me many months to understand that the best way to deal with this was to talk as if that really happened and just be like, yeah, that must've been really awkward that she asked you to serve the chicken, you know? And then she didn't. Athena (01:11:12): Meet her where she is. Ilana (01:11:14): Meet her where she is. Athena (01:11:14): You know that that is a world that is of her own creation and she's the only one in it at that moment. You choose to go in there with her instead of trying to drag her. Ilana (01:11:28): Absolutely. And, you know, she actually has been the inspiration for, um, several of my films. And, you know, because I realized that what my mother was doing was time traveling and she would genuinely leave the moment and say, be back at MoMA volunteering. And she'd be like, I can't talk right now because I have to get back to the desk. Athena (01:11:58): Interesting. Ilana (01:11:58): But meanwhile, we were in her living room in her apartment. She hadn't worked in MoMA for six months or eight months. And I was like, okay, well mom, I talked to your boss and she gave you the afternoon off so we can have lunch together. And she goes, oh, you did? Good. Okay, let's go. So, you know, but she was there. She was time traveling six months ago or years, decades. So I found that really inspirational in the sense that now I have, I have characters in Perception. Um, our female lead's mother, uh, who was a psychic, kind of has Alzheimer's basically, but it's never really addressed. And it's not clear whether it was the psychic powers that kind of made her, but she floats in and out of time. And in my science fiction films as well, the main character's doing the same thing because I think it's really fascinating to explore that. As you know, it's not necessarily a deficiency. If it's, if it makes them unpleasant, sad, then it's terrible. But if they're really just doing okay, then it's like, all right, well they're just in 1985 right now. You know? But that's okay too. Yeah. Athena (01:13:24): Yeah, I mean it sounds like you're almost sort of entering into the world and then like co-creating it. Like you're like, okay, well let's tell a story together and you're, you're playing this part where you called the Boss right- Ilana (01:13:40): Absolutely. Athena (01:13:40): And creating a new reality together. Ilana (01:13:43): And, exactly. And you know, some, some people close to us would say, oh, well that's not, you know, that's not the old Mitch, you know, she's not really herself anymore. I was like, well, you know, she's just changing and that's why, you know, at her Memorial, I wanted to talk about the last, um, the last year basically. Whereas everyone, you know, talked about the past that which is great because, but I was here, I was the one here with her in LA the last two years, um, you know, several times a week. So I saw it and I was like, I'm not going to leave out this part of her life because her memory is gone in the sense of any sort of linear progression, but her memory is fully intact. If she could remember, you know, a lunch or a tennis state she had in 1992 with- [Athena agrees] [Ilana laughs] Like that's interesting. Okay. Athena (01:14:48): Yeah. Things are just a little bit scrambled or something. Ilana (01:14:50): Yeah, right. Scrambled. Totally. Athena (01:14:55): But that doesn't mean that there aren't pieces that you can’t still connect from and weave together and you know, still be together in a meaningful way. Ilana (01:15:05): Right. And she always knew me. That was a consistent, the boys were, you know, a constant. Yeah. Athena (01:15:13): Well that's lucky too. Right? Because that is not always the case. Ilana (01:15:16): It's not, no, definitely not. So that was lucky. It was a little gift, right? Yeah. I mean she, I could only imagine, I think, I think the computer thing came, came along just late enough cause she, uh, at the beginning of the, her mild cognitive impairment, um, I had gotten her a computer, just a big, big old iMac and she had successfully done email for about a year and she did the MoMA thing and, and the volunteering. And it was all going really well until one day I came to the apartment and everything was unplugged. The computer was like on the floor, covered with, um, a tablecloth. And I was like, hey, what's going on with the computer there? She goes, there's someone who's figured out who I am and he's asking for money and I, I, I can't, I can't deal with it. I'm, I'm really scared he's going to, he's going to be asking for the bank account, which means he probably has the bank account. So it was a, it was a traditional, uh, phishing scammy email probably from the Nigerian Prince who asked for the, you know, your typical one. And it, it just totally short wired her brain. She just was like, I cannot ever look at that thing again. It freaked her out. Athena (01:16:41): But you know what, like that's kind of amazing that because she in a way had a level of meta awareness, right. Like this thing that is happening is really dangerous to me and that, you know, maybe I don't- Ilana (01:16:56): It was really good in a way. Athena (01:16:57): Yeah. Ilana (01:16:58): She survived. Right. So I was like, yeah, cause it's true. I mean it's true. She could have easily just been like, oh poor man, he needs help. Or hey, I won the lottery or- Athena (01:17:11): Right. Yeah. But she was able to recognize it. Something was really wrong. Ilana (01:17:17): Yeah she was. Athena (01:17:18): What was going on and then unplug it and put it on the floor. Ilana (01:17:21): And cover it. [Both laugh] So that was it. It was done. [Athena agrees] There was no more email after that. It was like all done. And you know, I assured her he wasn't coming after us, but yeah, no, she got out of that. I mean, my, my friend Lara, her mother had, and she's still alive and she is really checked out and uh, she got horribly scammed, um, by what happened was these people who work at pharmacies, some in her neighborhood, they sell information on who's getting dementia medication. Athena (01:17:59): No way. Ilana (01:18:00): Yes, they do. And they, she became a target and mail, hard mail, because she didn't ever do the computer and um, got scammed out of several thousand dollars. Yeah. Athena (01:18:15): I hadn't even thought about that. It's so dark. Ilana (01:18:17): It's so dark. It's so dark that someone, the very most vulnerable people. [Athena agrees] And uh, yeah, I, I don't know. So that's, those are Satan's children, when I hear stuff like that- Athena (01:18:34): You know, looking for the most vulnerable people. Try to manipulate them. I mean, that's like, you know, zombification horribleness. Right? Ilana (01:18:44): And, and, and just, it's, it is zombification and just this, what must be the mindset of someone who thinks that that's okay. It is zombification. It's like, I'm out for myself. It's a dog eat dog world. I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna bite your throat before you can bite mine [Athena agrees] Right. And I'd get paid like garbage at this job. And resentful and I don't know. [Athena agrees] I'm not at, sounds like we're making excuses for them, but yeah, it's terrible. Yeah. But. Athena (01:19:20): So I mean, that's awesome though for like going back to your film and how, you know, this sort of journey with Mitch played a role in like the characters and in a way it's also like a testament to this thing you're talking about earlier, just like being open to what is happening in your life. And like, right. You let that kind of come in and affect you and then affect your art and manifest now in this film that has a whole other dimension to it. That's true there- Ilana (01:19:55): Yeah. No, it's, that is, I'm grateful for that. And um, the, there are a couple of scenes that people were like, that's, that seems really well written. The mother daughter thing. I was like, well, thank you. [Both laugh] That came from a very special place. But, um, yeah, I mean, she's there, she's there. It's, um, yeah. I don't know. I mean, grief and mourning, it's, it's, it's so personal and um, but it's also something we all experience or will experience. Yeah. So in a way, it's also something that needs to be shared. Athena (01:20:41): Yeah. Yeah. This, I'm not sure how this sounds, but I feel like it's something that we'll all experience if we're lucky. right? [Ilana agrees] Because like to grieve, you have to have a deep connection, right? You have to have that and yeah, if you do have, you know, deep connections, then there will be grief and there will be, you know, a reckoning and a recalibration and like all of what comes along with and trying to, you know, reincorporate into your own life when that person is gone. But there are also these kinds of like hidden gifts in those jars too. Right? Ilana (01:21:32): There are hidden gifts. Yeah. Not, they don't know it was revealed to themselves so, so well, but yeah, it's, um, I dunno, I, I feel like I'm, I'm very much aware of when, um, I need to fall into that zombified state of that, just like dead state. It's usually, it has to do with feeling sad and not really wanting to fully experience that. And just to, and I say I'm going to just binge some Scandinavian noir, [Athena laughs] you know, detective noir stuff. Like right now, and I've got lots of Scandinavian detective shows that I like watching, [Athena laughs] you know, but for me, I'm sorry, I'm going to just wallow in it. And so I don't know. I mean, I want to be okay with that. I want that to not be a part of this feeling that I'm just, we're being taken over like I want to be. I like being at a point now where I can do that, where I can say, okay, I'm gonna watch, you know, three Netflix shows in a row because that's what I need to do right now. Then I'm going to put the computer away, then I'm going to do the dishes, then I'm going to write, then I'm going to work out. Then I'm going to be with my kids. I mean, you know, and just be okay to be part of our life, right. Not be consumed by that. Athena (01:23:06): So completely zombified by- Ilana (01:23:09): Right. Athena (01:23:09): And, and we do have a need sometimes to just like be distracted from things [Ilana agrees] and somehow that, you know, very easily just gets turned into like you've been watching for four and a half hours and then the next one is auto-playing and you're like, whoa. And then it's already started and you're like, [Athena laughs] And it's hard to push stop. Ilana (01:23:30): Right, might as well just watch it. [Athena laughs] And then, you know, and it's also like, I feel like for me personally, that is still better than, um, smoking a joint or having glass of wine or two or whatever, just, yeah, it's okay. There's scales, you know, there's- Athena (01:23:49): It's choose your poison. Ilana (01:23:50): Yeah, [Athena laughs] you know, but just be, be, you know, and I'm not judging people who do have a glass of wine that's, you know, whatever they need to do that, but to be aware of it and to not, you know, not let it take over you not let a habit. Once something becomes a habit, I think we've lost some of our humanity in some control and we're just like, yeah. On autopilot. Like you said, it's like autoplay. Right? Athena (01:24:23): But I personally enjoy having a glass of wine in the evening. But for me it's like, I like, I enjoy it and I savor it and it's like I'm, I try to be intentional [Ilana agrees] about it. So. Ilana (01:24:41): Then that works. That works because you're, you're not downing a bottle a night. I mean it's like [Ilana laughs]. Athena (01:24:48): Right, right. Ilana (01:24:49): Or compulsively or would you freak out if there wasn't wine? Athena (01:24:53): No, I just like how it tastes with food and- Ilana (01:24:56): So, you know, they're different. They're different levels here that we're talking about and everyone has to come to their own understanding of what's controlling them versus what they control for, like how is it serving you, serving you, and making you feel good, relaxed, and it's, you're actually okay then. Um, because you're thinking about it. See, I was starting to think about it a lot and think about not having it. So it became exhausting. Like the moderating became exhausting. So it was occupying so much space. So it's like, but then there are people who it's like you don't keep track of how often. Say you, uh, eat popcorn or corn on the cob or a banana. Like, oh, I've had two bananas today, I can't have another banana or whatever. So if it's like something that's taking over, like a lot of people with alcohol, it's just, they're not really thinking about it that much. [Athena agrees] But with pot and booze to try to, for me to try to moderate it was uh, it was, um, much like Facebook, I just moderate. So quitting was just so much easier- Athena (01:26:12): Hmm. Ilana (01:26:12): -so much easier. It's like I don't think about it ever. Athena (01:26:15): Yeah. That's interesting. [Ilana agrees] Well no, it kind of brings up this issue of like, you know, yes, what we need to do is figure out like is what we're doing actually like is that our goal? Like do we want that, um, and but it can be really hard to distinguish between like, you know, is this thing consistent with my goals and what I really want versus like I'm craving this right now? Right? [Ilana agrees] Like those are really different kinds of things. Like, you know, is it a compulsion or is it something where you can be reflective and say, yes, this is what I'm choosing cause it's helping me [Ilana agrees] to meet my goals or enjoy this next hour of my life or you know, whatever. Ilana (01:26:57): Goals are important. Athena (01:26:58): It is that you're trying to accomplish and just like stop and think like is what I'm doing right now actually [Ilana agrees] what I am wanting at a deep level? Ilana (01:27:10): But, We also need to be kind to ourselves too when we slip and when we say aren't always moving towards [Athena agrees] our goals because I think that that can be, you know, recipe to berate ourselves. Athena (01:27:26): That's right. Yeah. Ilana (01:27:27): You know? Yeah. Yeah. But not every day can be a productive work day, I think. Athena (01:27:34): Yeah. I still like I'll go on my phone and be like, what am I doing? You know, like 45 minutes later I'm like still mindlessly scrolling. Ilana (01:27:44): And then it starts to hurt a little. Athena (01:27:46): Exactly. [Both laugh] Yeah. Yeah. You're like ugh. So, yeah, I do think that giving time to ourselves about it is really important because fact is there's so many things that are constantly vying for our attention and it can be hard to keep, I don't know, keep that, um, ability to like, you know, focus or constrain your attention so that it's only going on the things that you want it to go on. [Ilana agrees] It's hard to do that when lots of things are just coming at you. And so when the screens that you can potentially be paying attention to, it's hard to shut all that down. Ilana (01:28:25): Right! No, it really is. It is. Yeah. Athena (01:28:29): So I want to, do you have any sort of thoughts for like where things are likely to go with the future of all this? And it sounds like a little bit like, you know, you're at a point of sort of like some optimism that people are starting to wake up a little bit to this and be like, I need to do something. I need to, you know, this isn't okay for me, but you're, you're seeing that and. Ilana (01:28:51): I'm seeing it, I'm seeing it amongst people I know and the people I follow it and read. Um, but I don't know if for a representative sample, [Athena agrees] [Ilana laughs] honestly I think, cause you know, I did not grow up with a computer in my house and my sense of, well mom, how did you check your email? [Both laugh] Athena (01:29:16): Yeah. Ilana (01:29:17): Oh well, um, you know, I had a landline, um, like a real landline, not these fake internet service provider, land lines that go out if the power goes out like good old mob bell. So, um, you know, I think my, my friends and I were totally into tech. We use it for our work and the whole thing. But I feel like we might be like more willing to, you know, people in their forties, late thirties, forties, 50s are probably more willing to kind of step away and examine it. And because we also have kids that are like so into it, so we're probably like, this is scary shit. Excuse me. Sorry, I'm cursing. Athena (01:30:09): No actually, you can curse. I should have told you that at the beginning. Ilana (01:30:10): Was that that first curse? [Athena laughs] In the whole time? I think I said ass, too Athena (01:30:15): Well now you did. [Both laugh] Ilana (01:30:18): But, um, so yeah, I'm optimistic because I think this is also the generation that has a lot of power. [Athena agrees] And, um, yeah, I don't see how much more addicted people can get. I honestly don't see how. Athena (01:30:39): There's not much time in the day. Right. Ilana (01:30:40): Yeah. I don't, I don't see how much worse it can get. I mean, I see municipalities banning texting and driving, but I still see people texting and driving. So, you know, a lot of people are dead because of the stupid phone. [Athena agrees] It's horrible. Yeah. So I am, but I am optimistic because at least for myself, people I know, I feel like I've kind of broken free a bit. Athena (01:31:09): Mmm. Mmm. Ilana (01:31:11): But I don't know what's going to happen. I mean, maybe Facebook does have to be chopped up and maybe there has to be a new algorithms. Maybe Mark Zuckerberg could just walk away from his kabillions of dollars and say, you know, I think I'll just change this algorithm. Yeah. Athena (01:31:27): That the whole business model is built on. That's right. Ilana (01:31:31): Yeah. It is. But so what, I mean, how much money does someone need? I mean, I dunno, I feel like there's a realignment that's happening in society as a whole and it's ugly right now on it's, you know, there's so much nastiness and racism and greed. Um, but if we don't go the other way, if we don't become more present and more aware, then the world's going to end. And I personally can't believe that, I have to have hope. [Athena agrees] I do. I'm a very optimistic person and I really see the bright side of technology and that's why I'm so into what, uh, ASU, the center science and imagination does because it's all about an optimistic view of the future through positive sci-fi because, you know, as opposed to dystopias and Armageddon, and. Athena (01:32:24): Not that there's anything wrong with the zombie apocalypse. [Athena laughs] Ilana (01:32:29): No I love it as a cinema, you know, it's wonderful, but, but no, but just like, let's envision, let's start envisioning the upsides of this technology. I mean, how great is FaceTime that you get to, [Athena agrees] that's a beautiful thing. Athena (01:32:43): Yeah. And how, you know, how could we build a better platform for social media? Like what, what would that be [Ilana agrees] and can we make it right? I think it's a great challenge for this next generation to like create something that serves our interests. Ilana (01:33:03): Yes, absolutely. Yeah. I mean I bet people would even pay, I bet people would pay $5 or a year or whatever a month to not have their privacy violated, psychological tests taken on them. Hopefully. Maybe not though. I don't know. Athena (01:33:22): I don't know either. But you know, I think there's also like a model for, you know, well what kind of a good is, you know, this social media platform and in a lot of ways it's a public good and so maybe there's some sort of a public funding model for something like that where, yeah. Ilana (01:33:40): No, that would be amazing. And I think, I don't know, they're just, I think being okay with being with yourself and being with people that you are in your immediate environment. Like be okay with not being enough some of the time. [Athena agrees] Like, that's, it's really okay in a way you're expanding your world, but by being with yourself and by just having a conversation with your neighbor or you know, taking a photo and sharing it with one person or even not sharing it at all and just sitting with it. Athena (01:34:22): Or even not taking a picture. Ilana (01:34:23): Or even not taking a picture. Exactly. And just thinking cause we don't know where that's going to lead us and that can be very expansive. Athena (01:34:31): Yeah. No, I like, I really like this idea that, you know, when we're on our screens, like we are missing out. Like the fear of missing out is real, but you're missing out on what is actually happening around you and the like amazing moments that you don't have because you're, you know, you're sucked into the screen and things- Ilana (01:34:57): And one I have noticed since I've moved here, which is very interesting at these parties I've gone to, um, people don't use their phones. Some of the ones that have like, um, VIPs, or some celebrities and I haven't been to any of like the super fancy Hollywood parties, but like people are just, they don't do it. And I find that very interesting. Athena (01:35:22): So there's like new norms. Ilana (01:35:24): A little bit. It would be like kind of considered uncool to take a picture of, in one of those places without, you want to be seen as kind of, I don't know what's the word? Like a hanger-on-er. Athena (01:35:38): Right. Ilana (01:35:38): Or gauche or something. Athena (01:35:40): Yeah it'd be kind of tacky. So. Ilana (01:35:43): I don't know. But then you know, all these celebrities, they post a million selfies. So it's just this very strange thing. I think there's, I think people are still trying to figure it out. But [Athena agrees] you know, it's, it's an interesting time, but I think we will find our balance. I'd like to think we'll find our balance. Athena (01:36:07): Yeah, I hope so. Well, Ilana, thank you so much. Ilana (01:36:09): Thank you! Athena (01:36:09): Thank you for sharing your brains. [Both laugh] With all of us Ilana (01:36:11): Any time. Athena (01:36:14): It was great to have you on the show. Ilana (01:36:15): I loved it. What a blast. Thank you. Outro: (01:36:37): [Psychological by Lemi] Athena (01:37:36): Zombified is a production of ASU and the Zombie Apocalypse Medicine Alliance. Thank you to the Department of Psychology, the Interdisciplinary Cooperation Initiative and the president's office at ASU, also to the Lincoln Center for Applied Ethics. Thanks especially to all of the brains that help make this podcast. I'm talking about you Tal rom making our awesome sound. Neil Smith, our illustrator, Lemi, who is the creator of our song, Psychological, and the entire Z team at ASU. Athena (01:38:07): You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram or @ZombifiedPod and we are ZombifiedPodcast on Facebook. Our website is zombified.org and on our website you can find our merch. We have zombified stickers. You can stick them on your water bottle or your computer or wherever you want to stick them. We also have cool t-shirts, um, with the zombified head on the front and it says "Zombified" on the back. So go on our website, get yourself a t-shirt and support zombified. You can also join us on Patreon. We are Zombified on Patreon. Athena (01:38:42): At the end of every episode, I share my brains a little bit. And what I want to share today are some thoughts that I have had about how our screen time and our social interactions have changed since the COVID pandemic fell upon us. So we recorded this episode before the pandemic and at the end, Ilana and I talk a little bit about FOMO, the fear of missing out. And it used to be that if you were not with people doing things that you could have a fear of missing out. But now because all of us have to be self- isolating for collective wellbeing, everyone is missing out. And in a way, because all of us are missing out. None of us are really missing out because there are no, you know, parties or get togethers or dinners or conferences even where people are getting together and talking and interacting with one another. So it's a really interesting time in that we maybe get a little bit more of a chance to be by ourselves, be with those who are closest to us, and take a little bit of a breather from always having that fear that we are missing out on something else out there. Thank you for listening to Zombified, your source for fresh brains. Outro: (01:40:36): [Psychological by Lemi].