The Permission Slip - S1-E2 Murphy === Matt Kosterman: Hi, my name is Matt Kosterman. I'm a 56-year-old white guy living in Chicago, Illinois. For the first 50 plus years of my life, I didn't think I was allowed to be here, not just here in Chicago, but here on earth in a body. I suffered from depression for most of my life. I smoked my first joint at age 11 and had my first drink of southern comfort straight from the bottle at age 13. While the cannabis never really took hold as an addiction, I drank alcohol for the next 20 years, many times to excess. In 1998, I began psychotherapy, and in the year 2000 I started on antidepressants. I spent 12 years on them in 15 years in traditional talk therapy. Meanwhile, I built a successful business, became a father to two amazing girls, and rehabbed an old house in a nice suburb. I did all the things. In 2010, I went through divorce, foreclosure, and bankruptcy. Fun times after much flailing about, I got my head on straight in 2015, only to begin experiencing severe chronic pelvic pain along with fibromyalgia. I spent nearly three years in the western medical system trying desperately to heal in 2018. Out of money and out of patience. My healing journey really kicked into gear after my first magic mushroom trip. The years since have been an amazing and challenging ride. I've traversed the physical and not so physical worlds and been fortunate to work with many, many talented healers. As a result of all my efforts, I now find myself in a place of receiving contentment and prosperity, the likes of which had alluded me for most of my life. There's a man named Darrell Anka, who channels a being called Bahar. Bahar describes the process of engaging with a healer that, of giving yourself what is essentially a permission slip to move towards wholeness healing and right relationship. This podcast is an effort to share some of what I've learned and introduce you to some of the people in ways that literally gave me what feels like my permission slip for existence. It's also an effort to continue to spread the word. That the traditional Western medical system, while effective for a great many things, is not necessarily the be all, end all solution to every health problem, especially when the problem may be more spiritual than it is physical, as it was in my case. Thanks for joining me. I hope you enjoy it. Please like, subscribe and do all the social media things that help spread the word, share these links with people directly in your community. It is my sincere hope that you and others will benefit from my experiences. With me today is a dear friend and advisor, Julie Murphy of JMC Wealth. She's based in Chicago, but works with people all over the place. Hi Julie. Thanks for being here. Really excited to chat today. Julie Murphy: Thanks, Matt. I appreciate being here. Matt Kosterman: This is, uh, little turn, little turnabout. I think my, my very first and only to date podcast as a guest like on yours couple years ago. And so much bet it Julie Murphy: was. Matt Kosterman: So much has changed, so much has changed. Um, so just a brief, uh, I just want to give everybody a brief background on, on how Julie and I met. Um, in 2008 or in 2009 and 10, I went through the big upheaval of divorce, foreclosure, and bankruptcy, the, the triumvirate, and cleared the slate. And I didn't know Julie back then, and I, uh, as in putting my life back together, I went through many, uh, personal growth things, uh, um, a lot of personal growth work, uh, including psychedelic medicines, which I'll talk more about in future episodes, uh, at an underground, uh, therapists who I. I had a very profound MDMA experience with, I had done a 12 day ayahuasca retreat in Ecuador in 2019, early 2019. Um, and I was still carrying, despite all of this, I was still carrying at the time about twice my net salary and debt. And, uh, my body was really messed up and I was deeply depressed. And I met, uh, I met Julie through a, a common friend who, uh, and, and pelvic floor therapist. And, and yes, men are allowed to go to these people too. So Vicki was our common thread. Uh, when she heard about my, yeah, my Ayahuasca experience, she said, well, you need to meet Julie Murphy. And I said, well, she told me about her. I said, yes, I do. So IU Up until then, I, I had a lot of resistance to working with another financial advisor because I was working with one when I got into all of the mess in two, 2009, I don't. Blame that person entirely. It was my doing, however, Julie Murphy: entirely. Entirely. Matt Kosterman: Uh, so anyway, Julie, Julie Murphy: there's some that needs to happen there. Matt Kosterman: I working on it. I'm Julie Murphy: sure, I'm sure though, that there are plenty of people listening to this that have an experience like that with somebody in the financial services world, though. Yeah. And so I'm, I'm glad that you aired your dirty laundry, if you will, because that actually makes it safer for other people to actually be like, yeah, like I used to say all the time, I'd go to networking events and I would like show up and I'd be like, oh, what do you do for a living? I'm like, oh, I'm a financial planner. They're like, oh, nice to meet you. Matt Kosterman: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Julie Murphy: And then they just walk away. I'm going, Matt Kosterman: right, Julie Murphy: like, I don't, many have a, a negative experience. In with somebody from the financial services industry. I mean, just ask somebody how they like the word insurance and they go, ugh. Right, Matt Kosterman: right, right, right. And, and, and the flip side is in, in our, you know, almost five year relationship now I've had an extremely positive, um, experience. I'm out of debt as of October. I'm earning more than, say it Julie Murphy: again, say it again. I'm proud Matt Kosterman: of debt Julie Murphy: outta Matt Kosterman: debt. I had a lot of tax debt that I had to work really hard to get rid of. Um, I'm earning more than ever and I have a modest level of saving and investments and my body is on. It's like almost there healed. It's really, really, truly remarkable. Um, and, and I give Julie a great deal of credit for this. So thank you for being here. Julie Murphy: It's really, yeah. You're welcome. Matt Kosterman: Been fun. So, um, with that I'd just like to, you know, give kind of, um, give people your, you know, your story. Where did, what did, how did you get to, to Sure, Julie Murphy: sure. Absolutely. How you work. Well, if you write a book about the emotion behind money, it's because you have emotion behind money. That was my first book. You know, I grew up with 11 brothers and sisters, and everyone always says, same parents. I'm like, yes, the same parents. Um, there were 12 of us born in 16 years. Um, same mom, same dad. And, um, so we didn't have money and, um, I, my first job, I think was delivering the Penny Saver at six years old. Um, and I delivered the Chicago Sun Times and the Tribune before school in sixth, seventh, and eighth grade. And so I've, I pretty much have always had a job. And then it was like, oh, money gives you choices. Like, okay. So that's how I figured out I was the top salesperson for Midlothian girls softball. They still like, oh my God, you're the girl that sold the most candy bars. 'cause it was just about the fact that, oh, there was a 10 speed bike. My parents couldn't afford to buy me a bike, so I was getting a bike. And that's how I got it. They eventually started calling me saying, jewel, uh, what do you want this shoe? I was like, that was awesome. They got off easy. I only asked for a hundred bucks. I should have asked for a lot more. 'cause God knows they made a lot more money than that. But that's, you know, so I just naturally, so I didn't grow up with money, but I learned how to become what I call income affluent. And then the trick was actually becoming asset affluent. Mm. Because it's a different energy, um, to, to generate income and have cash flow than actually amassing. Assets. And, um, and coming from where I came from, uh, all I did was amass a bunch of debt, you know? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Did the typical thing of, I remember when I was going away to college, my mom was like, well, you're not going to college unless you take on debt. And I was like, I was like devastated. 'cause I naturally do not like debt. Hmm. And so my mom, um, I, I did, I created this student loan debt and, but I gave myself a reward when I paid off that student loan debt. I, you know, bought myself an emerald ring that I still have to this day. And, um, so I didn't grow up with it, figured out how to amass it, started my own business when I was 22. Um, I just think I was too stubborn to work for any corporation and I was like, I can make this, I can do this. And, um, honest to God, I had really great mentors that the universe just synchronized in my space. And as that all synchronized, um, I. I figured I wasn't going back to eating fried bologna and mac and cheese. I, I wasn't doing that. Yeah. So it was like I had nothing to lose, so I just kept jumping off cliffs and going, okay, I'll do that. Okay, I'll do that. And uh, and I had great mentors along the way that showed me the path. And now I believe that that was my path because no one can tell me like, oh, well you just don't understand, right? And I'm like, oh, I do. Been, been there, done that, screwed up the mistakes, did the dance with debt, did the dance with lots of cash flow and income. And it's amazing. You know, my business was just evaluated for over $10 million and I'm like, I didn't grow up with anything and I've learned to grow stuff and voila. And I'm still young. I don't have too many wrinkles, and I don't have any dye in my hair. And I'm 51, so it's all good. Matt Kosterman: Well, and that's, and that's a, that's a great point. 'cause you also bring a ton of joy and happiness that, that I think for me, I always thought that the happiness would come when I got the money. Julie Murphy: Mm. Everybody does by the way. Everything, Matt Kosterman: it's a common thing. 'cause, Julie Murphy: so I categorize people as the poor debtors, dreamers, accumulators, and then rich, but empty because everyone who is poor debtor, dreamer or accumulator, they think once they get the money, yeah. It's all gonna be, and I'm like, but then you become rich, but empty. Yeah. And my second book, awaken Your Wealth, talks about how to embody real wealth. And that's when you have the embodiment, the only, the only piece to obtaining real wealth. Is being exactly who you are in authentic you of why you came to this planet and be that. But many of us negotiate that away because we've gone for the career, we've gone for the accomplishment, we've gone for the things that are outside of ourself as opposed to being exactly who we are inside of ourselves. Yeah. 'cause of usually fear, Matt Kosterman: a hundred percent fear. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I was never more miserable than I was at my peak earning. Julie Murphy: Right. Matt Kosterman: And current, you know, not the peak that I'll ever make thus far, not far clarify words. Language is important. Super Julie Murphy: important. Matt Kosterman: Super important. Which you've, which you've taught me, um, a lot about. Um, yeah, that's, that's amazing. And uh, and then, you know, what I find is the universe will clear the decks if you're not, if you're not on the right, if you're not embodying who you really are. Julie Murphy: Yeah. So that is true. I talk about that in the emotion behind money where, you know, if you know you're supposed to leave a job and you don't, you get laid off. I had a really good friend of mine, spent her whole twenties and thirties in an accounting firm, and she gave her life to this accounting firm. And then in her early forties, she was walking in there ready to become partner. She never married anything like she was married to this firm. Yeah. Worked a ton. And they said, unless you have a severe shift in your personality, you'll never be a partner here. So we've decided to give you a severance package. Wow. But she knew for years she didn't fit in there. Yeah. But she was tr she had this not enough button, I don't feel worthy button that she was trying to prove she could do it. She could prove it and prove it through all of her hard work. Yeah. And the only thing she was proven was that she wasn't in line with self, and the two by four came and cracked her over the head and they gave her her papers sending her out the door. So the universe will align you with yourself one way or the other, whether it's through. Layoff disease, divorce, like there's some crisis you're gonna call into your life. Matt Kosterman: All of the above. Julie Murphy: Yes, Matt Kosterman: please. All of the above. Oh, Julie Murphy: slow, slow learner, Matt. Matt Kosterman: Some things Yes, I'm, Julie Murphy: no, I know. Me too. Like it comes in different packages, right? Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: Because you can't see it until you can see it, right? Nobody can, Matt Kosterman: yeah. It's Julie Murphy: part, part of the, I just love yourself along the way. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Yeah. It's part of the plan. It's just, it's how it works. Um, my whole life, my whole life, you know, since I was a kid, I wanted to be older. I wanted to be the next thing. I wanted to be the next thing. I wanted to be the next thing. Right. As opposed to being the thing that I am right now. Julie Murphy: Hmm. Totally. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: Yeah. Matt Kosterman: Um, so talk, tell me about some of the big, you said you had some mentors, like what are the biggest influences in your life, whether they were people or events or, Julie Murphy: yeah. You know, I mean, I really believe that it's important that when you recognize the synchronicity of life, um, you know, Deepak Chopra has a book called Synchro Destiny, and it talks about this a lot. And, um, when you can see that, oh, like for example, one of my mentors was this gentleman Bob Lyman, and he still to this day, is one of my mentors. He's 12 years older than me, so he was in his early thirties when I was coming out college and just a few more years in the business than me. And I went to Prudential when I was a senior college and I was like, oh my God. I decided this is what I wanna do for a living. And Prudential invited me to their office here in Oakbrook. And I get there and I was like, okay, I'm ready. Blah, blah. This guy totally. Was saying all the things that I was like, yep, I align with that. I align with that. I align with that. And then I get a thing in the mail that says, we're sorry, um, you didn't answer the questions. So bottom line was I didn't come from a wealthy family and I had a lot of student loan debt, so I was not likely to be successful in my business, so they didn't want me. Oh. So I wound up taking a job with John Hancock when I first came outta school, and the universe conspires in interesting ways. Mm-hmm. Eight months after I started there. Guess who came in as my new boss? Matt Kosterman: Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: Bob Lyman. Matt Kosterman: Lyman. Julie Murphy: So I have these experiences of like, so these mentors come in and, and I was like, I totally knew that. I was so confused when it didn't work out at Prudential. Like super confused. Well, there was a bigger plan, there was a way bigger plan. And to this day, my business is still aligned with him. And so there's other mentors along the way. Like I, you know, there's a lot of men, white men in my industry. Yeah. And not a lot of women, not a lot of minorities. Like I would go to an event where there was a thousand financial planners and there would be two women, and I was one of 'em. Yeah. That's when I started in the industry. Today, at least it's now up to like 13%. Yeah. Women, you know. But, um, I wanted to find a woman who was a financial planner, who had it all, the marriage, the kids, the everything. Like, 'cause I, I set the intention that I wanted it all. So I wanted to find a mentor that had that same thing. The universe conspired. And actually it was Bob Lyman that actually met her somewhere else and said, Hey, I wanna connect you guys. And so she was a mentor for years and, you know, they continue to come into my life and, um, whether it's spiritual teachers, because I certainly have those too, you know, uh, 2014 I had a near-death experience giving birth to my fourth child where I saw the light, the whole thing. I felt like I was Patrick Swayze in the movie Ghost. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, um, and I'm recovering afterwards. I'm in bed 'cause I'm down and out for a few months and, um, all of a sudden three people sent me Panache de size book. Mm-hmm. And he's, he's was my, one of my biggest spiritual teachers. You know, I, I worked with Deepak Chopper for about a decade and then here comes Panache. Then I'm sitting there watching TV while I'm recovering and Panache is on the Oprah Show. I'm like, okay. Three people sent me his book. He's on the Oprah Show as I'm watching the tv and like he just popped up everywhere. So then I was like, okay, well I found myself two years after that. Um, he sends out an email. 'cause the next year, 2015, I did every program that he had. And then at the end of that year, he was picking five people to coach one-on-one. And out of all the people that applied, he chose me as one of them. Matt Kosterman: He chose you. Yeah. You Julie Murphy: know, like, um, so from spiritual teachers to people in the financial industries to even relationship, you know, mentors. It's like if you really wanna accomplish something in your life, well then get somebody who's been there and done that so that your learning curve can be shorter. Mm-hmm. And you can feel supported in a way and doing something that you've never done before. So when you get that nosebleed, they go, oh, that's part of the process. Don't worry about that. Just get back up on the horse and keep going. Yeah, Matt Kosterman: yeah. Yeah. Julie Murphy: I think it's so important because then you look at things as not like these mountains, but little mo hills. Right, right. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. 'cause you have a, there's a reference, there's a reference point. Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: So exactly. Matt Kosterman: So, yeah. And speaking of influences though, you, you introduced me to a, another gentleman who I hope to have on the show at one, at some point. David Gallardi. Julie Murphy: Yes. He's actually coming to my house tomorrow. Oh, you, you should come out for dinner this week. Matt Kosterman: Oh, that great. I'd love to see him. Yeah. Da Brad. Michael David Gallardi. Julie Murphy: Yeah. Yes. Matt Kosterman: All of the names. Um, yeah. And, uh, he, he was, he's been a, a, a huge help in my journey as well to healing. So thank you for that. Uh, how did you meet David originally? Julie Murphy: Synchronicity again, right? Yeah. So, um, I was working with a woman in Sedona, Arizona as one of my spiritual coaches, Ann Emerson. She does holographic re-patterning. And, um, she said, yeah, you don't actually need to do some work with me. You're supposed to work with, and at the time he was going by Michael. Mm-hmm. Um, and uh, so I went and met him and at the time I was married, had no idea. This was before, um, no, this was after the near death experience. It was, uh, that, it was about a year and a half after that. And I was like, okay. And so when I met him, and first thing he says to me, he goes. I don't really know if you're gonna stay married. And I was like, what? And I was like, because he is this guy's spiritual channels, high frequency energy and he works with crystals. And I was going, ah, this guy might be a little kooky, but uh, yeah, I dunno. I just had four, my fourth kid. I'm like, okay, we're all here in Sedona. And literally like, no joke Matt, no joke. We're about to leave Sedona, Arizona. And I really believe that everything happens for a reason. And like there's emotional reasons why diseases happen and there's books that explain it and all that stuff. Mm-hmm. And um, we were going to this place to see these coyotes and wolves and stuff, and my ex-husband was going to find out where to go and he literally fell off the curb. And he's like wailing and screaming. And this is in, so this is right after David tells me I'm no longer gonna be married. And, and I'm like, uh, I was just like, you gotta be kidding me. So this whole experience was like, I can't do this with this guy anymore. Like it was the first time I was like, I'm really done. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. On Julie Murphy: some level I was done. Yeah. But David, um, you know, we are energy. Einstein proved that. Yeah. And so I have learned that when you have high frequency people who work in the energy field, whether it's holographic, re-patterning, or channeling, um, that it can help your energetic field actually shift. When you're not able to shift to yourself and it happens way faster. So things can move in your life at a faster pace, in alignment more to get back to your authentic self. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And Julie Murphy: that's really what my journey has been. You know, David now and my, I do coaching group coaching now, and David does the tail end of it now. Mm-hmm. Um, he does with my whole group that I coach, um, he does, uh, channels high frequency to help people get to that next place. Yeah. So it's actually pretty effective. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And this, and this is what I love so much about working with you 'cause it's completely aligned with, with, you know, with my journey. It took, it took a while, it took a lot of, a lot of psychedelics to, to, to crack that nut open, um, for me. But, uh, it, it really is all energy and, uh. There are pe there are, you know, it's a Have you read any, have you read any, David Hawkins? Have you read any of his books? Julie Murphy: You know, it's funny, I just actually ordered a couple of his books, but I have not read them yet. Matt Kosterman: Phenomenal. Yeah. And I was talking with Renee about it, uh, on the last episode, but, uh, power versus Force is a, mm-hmm. Is what describes literally mathematically how the energy works in the universe. Hmm. Um, and, and it's been, I, I think for me, and for you as well, it's been, you talked about it earlier, embodying, you have to embody these things. And, and that's a big theme for this show for me. Um, because you can have it all mentally, you can study it, you can do whatever, but until you're feeling it in your body, until things are flowing through your body, it's not real. Julie Murphy: Right. It's true. That's absolutely true because you have to feel it because your heart is the bigness. Okay, lemme back up here a second. They learned from an organization from HeartMath in 2008 that the human heart, the magnetic force of the earth, went up 4.1 times its normal reading. And because of nine 11, they realized that it was the human heart that actually did that because they looked at other points in time when the magnetic force was really high on the earth and it was when Princess Diana died, when Mother Theresa died, it's when the whole world, their heart Matt Kosterman: mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: Went out. And nine 11 was one of those dates. And that's when they realized going, oh my gosh. Well, what is a magnetic force of human heart? Then they did studies and they now know that it goes for over eight miles and they just don't have anything to measure it longer than that. Sure. And so when you understand that your heart is the biggest magnet and your mind, by the way. Only magnetize for two feet. Yeah. So the only thing that you're gonna magnetize yourself are you're thinking about stuff, Hey, I'm gonna think my way and my mindset is gonna get me here. Guess what? Your mindset is not gonna get you there. It's your feelings and your heart that magnetize and draw in what it is that you wanna create in your world. And that's why it's so important. 'cause you gotta feel the feelings as if it's already happened, even though it's not your reality. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And, and so often in my experience, feeling those feelings has been difficult because there's other stuff in the way blocking it energetically. Julie Murphy: Totally. Right. All of our subconscious patterning before we were seven years old. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And so it's it and it's, and it's not what I've discovered. Is it maybe the same for you? It's not so much, um, discovering that it's there. Right. We all kind of know we have trauma, especially these days. It's all you can hear about out there is trauma. Trauma, trauma. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. Right. But Matt Kosterman: it's, it's identifying and feeling through and releasing. These, these stuck things. I mean, lit, you know, the emotions are there to be felt. Julie Murphy: That's the only way to the other side, right? Is to feel the emotions. That's it. Yeah. That's it. And, Matt Kosterman: and the, and would you agree that the block to that is the fear of, of, of overwhelm. That if that, if I, well, for you, Julie Murphy: it might be the feel of fear of overwhelm, but for somebody else it could be the fear of something else, right? Sure. But it is, it's an, it's an unprocessed emotion, whether it's anxiety, fear, depression, whatever. Yeah. It's just unfelt, low vibrating emotions that literally you just have to feel. So let me give an example to this. 'cause sometimes that sounds esoteric to people. So like, after I got my divorce, I was like, God, what is going on? Because I know that if you're en rage, that's just deep anger. And deep anger is just sadness. So I was, I was like super sad and I just kept tapping my heart going, why am I sad? Why am I sad? Why am I sad? Because I was trying to activate that part in me that didn't feel these feelings that I needed to get out so that I could expand and grow. And so, um, it took about three months of me just being like, why am I sad? Why am I sad? And then finally my field opened up and I had the biggest cry in my life, and I just sat down. It was like, because Julie hasn't failed at anything and my marriage had failed. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: And I was just sad about that. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Whi whi which is okay. Right? Julie Murphy: Totally. Okay. Right. But I just needed to feel the feeling and unpack it and get rid of that low vibrating emotion so that everything could elevate. Yeah. Yeah. So more income could come in, more love can come in more everything. Right. Matt Kosterman: And it's, and I think there's a, a cultural programming. I mean, we all have our own stuff around, uh, masculine and feminine. You know, what we're, we've been programmed that we're allowed to do. And for men, it especially being allowed to cry is not high on the list. Julie Murphy: Right. You know, Matt Kosterman: for women, you're not allowed to be aggressive. Julie Murphy: Right. Matt Kosterman: You're not. I mean, that's, I missed that Julie Murphy: demo. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Right. You didn't get, I know you didn't get that one. A Julie Murphy: feisty Irish girl from the south side with eight brothers. Yeah. I figured out how to be aggressive. Matt Kosterman: Aggressive, but in general, the, the narrative, right. Is that Julie Murphy: Totally agree. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And, and what I've, if I've learned nothing else, it's that it's okay to feel whatever emotion you need to feel and act however you need to act, as long as you're not hurting anybody else in the process. Julie Murphy: Right. As long as you don't harm your others. Absolutely. Matt Kosterman: So again, I just, you know, I kind of wanna remind everybody that Julie Murphy's a financial advisor and, and these aren't, you know, this is the stuff that you usually talk with your financial advisor about. Um, well Julie Murphy: let's talk about that. Okay. So I just had a client call the other day and because we've had an election here in the United States mm-hmm. And, um, I literally am like, okay, I'm gonna poke the bear. So do you feel like we're in a dictatorship or are you like thinking it's the best thing since sliced bread because there's not a whole lot of people in between? Sure. And um, so I had a call of somebody who feels like, oh my God, this is Hitler all over again and. It's not good nor bad, it's just whatever. This is how she's emotionally feeling. Mm-hmm. And in the conversation she's like, I wanna know how I can buy gold bars. Because the only people that survived the Holocaust and everything with Hitler is they had to have something to trade and they had to have money. And that's how they got through. And I was like, okay, well, so again, this is what she's feeling. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. ' Julie Murphy: cause I can sit there and talk about the economics and right now Trump is going to inherit a healthy economy. That's what's going on right now, in this moment in time. That's where the economic indicators are all at. We don't know what's gonna happen, but you're stepping into a healthy one. And then what is going to unpack from there? Well, um, we look like we're at the beginning stages of the next six to eight year bull market. But this is not, when you're having conversations, I need gold bars. The cold, the sky is falling. Right? Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: Yeah. And that's not good nor bad, but it's about the fact that we need this integration when we're doing our money management. We need this integration between our heart and our heads. Mm-hmm. Right? It's like, okay, well if I don't acknowledge the fact that she wants to have gold bars, whether I think that's good or bad, I, I tell her my professional opinion on that. And then I say, if she's sleeping better at night and the rate of return doesn't matter 'cause she's amassed enough wealth, like who cares if she has gold bars in her house? Like, who cares? But we have all this judgment around how your financial package should be, and the only way your financial package should be is the one that makes you sleep well at night and gives you compar, co competitive rates of return because you have to be able to be grounded because with a hijacked nervous system. You won't manifest and magnetize anything to you. Yeah. So you need to have a neutralized nervous system in your physical body. And if you don't have that, that's the, that's the secret sauce in what I do when I work with clients is going, well, where's your nervous system in neutral? And people are like, what are you talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 'cause we've ignored our own nervous systems for so long, we don't even know what that is. Matt Kosterman: Right. Julie Murphy: And so in working with them Matt Kosterman: to feel regulated, Julie Murphy: well, we don't even know that we should put our feelings into our money management. Matt Kosterman: Right. Well, but much less know what it feels like to feel regulated in your nervous system to feel adding. Oh, it Julie Murphy: feels foreign Matt Kosterman: to, totally foreign. Julie Murphy: It's like a foreign language to most people. And I always tell people, you gotta build that muscle. You gotta build that muscle memory of going, it's okay to be okay. Right. It's okay to not suffer. It's okay to expand and be all right with it. Matt Kosterman: Again, the, the, the, the podcast, you're allowed, you're allowed to do these things. You're, you're, you're allowed, you know, you're allowed to feel good. It's, it's okay. And I don't, I don't know for, for you, but for me, it's been work with psychedelics that's given me those embodied feelings so that I had a touch point. Right. So, yeah. For Julie Murphy: me, you know, and this is where you and I connected, right. For me it was post my divorce. I had really bad PTSD. Mm-hmm. And then it was suggested to me, um, with Panache Desai to journey with him down to Costa Rica where he was teaching. And I was like, what? Mm-hmm. And that was my first experience of working with Ayahuasca. Yeah. And I will tell you what it did, is it actually cleared four, four ceremonies, cleared all the PTSD outta my system. Mm-hmm. And then what does it do? It, it aligns my nervous system. And then, oh, now I can expand out of all this trauma from being attacked in the legal system. To like, okay, now I can lead everything to a better place. Great, Matt Kosterman: great. Right. Whatever tool, whatever tool. And, and, and, and I, I also want to be careful 'cause there's a lot of a narrative out there of like, just go do ayahuasca and you're fixed. No. And that, that, that's not how it, it, it usually works maybe for some people. Um, but it's work in the physical, in the 3D It's work, like the work with Julie. And she says, and I say, you know, what do I need to do? And she says, here's what you need to do. And I do that and it works Julie Murphy: right? But Matt Kosterman: it, but it's always aligned with, like you said, with my nervous system, with my values, with my, you know, growth goals. Spiritually, physically, a hundred percent. Julie Murphy: It's, it's gotta align with yourself. If it doesn't, then you're not embodying real wealth. And then what you do is you create a financial house that's built on stilts. When it's not aligned with you, authentic, authentically easy for you to say, that's a tongue twister. Uh, you gotta be plugging into the world authentically, or it's not going. It's built on stilts, and you will create financially legal, financial, leaky containers. So for example, if you're not doing a job that you absolutely love and you're passionate about today, you might have been passionate about it 10 years ago, but today it's not feeding your soul. You don't leave. At some point you're getting a package and you're getting sent out the door. Right. If you're lucky. Right. You know, if you're not tending to, like, let's say you work all the time and you're not tending to your relationship in your marriage, well then you get divorced and 50% of your money's going out the door. Yeah. Right? So you create these leaky containers because your house is built on stilts because you're not plugging into the world authentically. Matt Kosterman: Right. Right. How so talk, talking about spiritual goals and alignment and stilts. How, how would you say money is spiritual? Julie Murphy: Well, my last book is The Four Spiritual Laws of Money. Matt Kosterman: Well, there you go. So you've said it. So read the book. Julie Murphy: So read Matt Kosterman: the book, spiritual Julie Murphy: Laws of Money. Um, no, but let me share them with you. Um, because again, money is energy, right? Mm-hmm. Um, the first one is manifestation begins with desire. Again, that goes back to the magnet of the heart, right? And I dive deeper into that. Matt Kosterman: Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: The heart is stronger than the brain that goes to the effect, eight miles versus the two feet. Your intentions redirect energy. Matt Kosterman: Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: Because what you are intending then creates your tomorrow. If you do today, what you've done in the past, all you're gonna do is recreate your past. Right? Instead of planting the seeds for your intentions, for your future. So then it redirects it, so you're breaking suffering patterns. And then also the universe responds to action because the universe can synchronize everything, but if you don't step into it Yeah. Like you can see I'm going, Hey, this is the direction you're supposed to go. And if you don't step into it, then it's like, oh, well you screwed the pooch on that one. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Yeah. Well, and you know, and you know, the flip side of it that is, Hey, this is where you're supposed to go and things will line up. You know, I, I have had, I had the experience, uh, post Sedona in 2021 of wanting to get into this, um, sound healing system and, and to purchase the system and the universe was it, it was as if I was trying to sell somebody this system who didn't wanna buy it. I couldn't hardly buy this thing. I could hardly spend the money on it. And it was like everywhere I turned, the universe was making it difficult. And I was so damn bullheaded. I was hell bent for election and I was gonna have this system and, and I bought it. And I did a bit of good with it, but it just simply was not aligned with who I'm here to be. And I, you know, I could have listened to it earlier. I didn't. It's fine. It was a lesson I got learning out of it. Julie Murphy: And what you do is, so what we realize is that we are who we are. That doesn't change, right? And what's important is that, um, as you peel the onion in, plugging into the world more authentically, hold a safe space for yourself because you can only learn the lessons and the timeframe that you can learn the lessons. And there is, there, there is a lot of things and people out in the world that'll beat you up. There is no sense in you beating yourself up. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Yeah. Change, changing that internal voice Julie Murphy: so important. Matt Kosterman: Huge. And so, so Julie Murphy: important. Matt Kosterman: And the first step is to, is to listen to it and hear and, and hear it negative or positive, and then, Julie Murphy: right. Matt Kosterman: Um, 'cause your body, it responds Julie Murphy: totally to Matt Kosterman: the, to the negativity or the positivity. Julie Murphy: Yep. Absolutely. Matt Kosterman: So you talked a little bit, you've got your, you've got your books, um, you have your coaching group Tell, talk about how, how do you, how do you work with people typically? What's the Julie Murphy: Yeah. You know, one of the things that's important in my life's purpose is that, you know, again, I didn't come from money. And so, um, a lot of people who hire financial planners are the ones that pay me $5,000 to do an analysis for a year and stuff like that. And, um, I came to realize going, I wanna create a business that no matter where somebody's financial situation is, that they can plug into the information. And so that they can do their work. And so in light of that, so I actually have two companies. One is Julie Murphy um, dot com and the other is jmc wealth management.com. And you can go to either one of those websites, they're separate because one actually manages money and the other one is the coaching and consulting and the books and the online courses. Um, so I have everything from, obviously all my social media free stuff to, um, I hold a group workshop, um, periodically. So if you get on my email list, you know, you'll know when you'll alert when those are. Um, and I do it for an hour and a half. I just invite anyone who wants to come and so they can get a taste or get some help. Um, so financially, if that's what works for you better, then great. Then I have where you can go deeper and another group one where it's a little bit more intimate. Um, and then also I have an online course that is a six week course where you get me twice a week in group coaching, as well as lots of lessons and exercises and things to work through that I've learned from working with my clients all through the years. I've created an automated system that has that and then me twice a week to coach you along the way for six weeks and, um, you for that course, it's impact your life now. Um, dot com and, um, and I'll put all Matt Kosterman: these in wherever. Julie Murphy: Yeah. And so my books are all on Amazon. Um, I have books and workbooks to go with the exercises to walk you through. Um. Tons of social media videos. Mm-hmm. A YouTube channel. My Instagram's awaken with Julie. You know, so this is about where it is that you're at, whether you're a poor debtor, dreamer, accumulator, or if you're the rich, but empty. Mm-hmm. Um, uh, we have a place, uh, where it is that you can plug into because I have teams on both sides that help to support people to get to financial wellness. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Beautiful. What? Uh, and, and then, and then and, and in a, in a range of, uh, economic, uh, accessibility as well. Julie Murphy: Yeah. That's why I've created the system, Matt Kosterman: right? Julie Murphy: Yeah. All the way from free to deep dive course to working with me one-on-one or one of the financial planners in my office, one-on-one. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Yeah. Great. Julie Murphy: So what, yeah, because it's important because to me, um, again, I, my dad was an electrician and my mom was an at-home mom. I. I didn't grow up with tons of money. And you know, there's a lot of hardworking people who have good intentions that just fiscally have gotten stuck in the financial matrix of this country, which is our debt system is set up so that you are controlled by this system. Right. And, you know, you talk, talk more about that. Yeah. I wrote that down as you're like, what advice? One of the questions you told me was what advice and, and, and this is about, um, you are not plugging into the world from a place of financial empowerment or to having choices for yourself to not only live in the present moment, but to create the future if you have all this debt. I realized it back years ago when, um, Suzy Orman was on the Oprah Winfrey show and, um, she'd said she started yelling at this lady who was a CPA. You need to get outta debt. She had $79,000 of credit card debt on like 17 different credit cards or something like that. Oh Matt Kosterman: wow. And this was back when I was a lot of money. Julie Murphy: Right. And she's like, you can't do that. Don't do that. You can't spend your money emotionally if you don't feel like you have no choice but to have to pay that debt off. You feel like you're in financial jail. Like that doesn't feel good to anyone. And if, and if your magnet of your heart and your feelings is what's creating your future, why do you wanna be pulverized and be stuck like that? And I'm not saying go declare bankruptcy 'cause you gotta build the muscles because that's why people declare bankruptcy over and over again. Right? 'cause it becomes a lifestyle. Right. And so what it is, is that you go, oh, I wanna clean up my financial past or my debt. So you come up with a good plan to do that. And my courses and my worksheets and everything includes this process while you're living in the present moment, the way that you wanna live. And plant the seeds for the future. If you don't do that simultaneously, what you're gonna do is you're gonna only recreate your past. 'cause people tell me like, well, I'm gonna start my financial plan and do these other things after I get my credit card paid off. And I go, okay, so if money is energy and your money is going to only paying off your debt, what are you only going to create? Matt Kosterman: Get more debt. Julie Murphy: Exactly. Yeah. So this is why we want to put those debt payments on autopilot. Think of it even like, I have my alimony payments, right? That's a debt, right? Mm-hmm. And I don't wanna think about it ever, ever. Matt Kosterman: And I was so fucking resistant to doing that because Julie Murphy: I thought Matt Kosterman: if, if I was doing it every month, that I was in control of it. Julie Murphy: Oh yeah. Control is an illusion, Matt Kosterman: right? Well, what, well, what I realized was I gave up the control when I took on the debt that that was when I was in control of it at that moment. Julie Murphy: Right. So true. Matt Kosterman: And after that, I'm not in control. 'cause now this is a, this is a debt that's due. Julie Murphy: Right? Exactly. So it's about the fact that when you like my alimony payments, I just have it automatically go into a checking account from my pay stubs. I never see it. It goes in and out to him, and I never ever see it. Right. And that way I'm not emotionally triggered on something negative every two weeks. I don't wanna be triggered by that. I want it to be an autopilot. I want it to be outta sight out of mind. It's like paying for my past decisions. Don't wanna keep paying for that. And someday there's an end day and then all of a sudden my cash flow opens right up. Matt Kosterman: Yep, yep. And that's exactly okay. Julie Murphy: Now what? Matt Kosterman: Yeah, right. Same thing is Julie Murphy: for car payments, house payments, credit card payments. Student loan payments. The truth, it's any debt. You are not financially empowered in the present moment if you have to pay for all your past choices, so Right, Matt Kosterman: right. In the long, it's about, yeah, go ahead. Sorry. Julie Murphy: I was just gonna say, it's about becoming your own bank. Mm Matt Kosterman: mm Julie Murphy: Meaning you have to interrupt that cycle. Meaning when you pay off your car, keep making the payment, just don't make it to a bank, you make it to yourself. How do you do that? You set up a savings account and you call it your car fund, new car fund, and then you don't touch that money until you go buy a new car. That's how you become financially empowered. Yeah. Every time you open up some cashflow or you get a pay raise or a bonus or a tax return, you seed the things that you want for your future with all that new money. Yep. And that gets you to where you wanna be. So you're changing your trajectory and then you're choosing a life that's based on real wealth. So you're happy no matter what your financial circumstance is. Mm-hmm. Matt Kosterman: Because Julie Murphy: you're building it on you, and that's the only way to be sustainably happy. Yeah. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And it's, you know what, what struck me is it's a bit like, you know, your description of people putting on an autopilot so you're not having to process it and deal with it. You know, it's the way our income tax system works at the corporate level, at the employee level. Right. Totally. You never see it. Yeah. Julie Murphy: When people, when when people get outta credit card debt, they always, the next step is they always create debt with the US government. Yeah. Its like, which is what? It's like it's textbook, it happens to everybody. I see it happen all the time. Yeah. Lender of last resort. Right, right. And you're just creating a bigger deficit for yourself. Yeah. Matt Kosterman: And it's not one that ever goes away. Julie Murphy: Right. Well, and one of the other pieces advice that I have is look at the company that you keep. So if you're around people who are living the life financially, the way you wanna live, then keep hanging out with them. Mm-hmm. I realized this in the 2008, 2009 financial crisis that I had a couple clients that worked for General Motors and I, general Motors got bailed out by the government in bankruptcy. I was like, oh, these people personally operate the exact same way as the company. Is that fascinating? 'cause they were all fiscally screwed up in their cash flows. Interesting. Well, that's why GM needed to be So you are the company you keep. Yeah. So when I'm coaching business owners, I'm like, you're fiscally prudent. You need to have fiscally prudent employees. Mm. You know, and like pull their credit reports. Pull their driver's record. There's a reason insurance companies do that. Interesting. Because they know who you are. Right. And it's like, if you're not fiscally prudent, well why do I want you to be working with me? 'cause then you're just gonna expect pay raises and bonuses for me to bail your fiscal dysfunction out. Oh Matt Kosterman: yeah, yeah, yeah. Julie Murphy: And then they become a pain in your ass. And then they say to everybody that you're a terrible boss. Matt Kosterman: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's Julie Murphy: really just has to do with their personal fiscal dysfunction Matt Kosterman: and drags the energy of the whole enterprise down. Julie Murphy: Exactly. Because everything is energy. Matt Kosterman: Right. Which goes back to the Hawkins map. And if you're below courage on the map, if your view of the world, it's pulling you down. Yep, Julie Murphy: totally. Matt Kosterman: And it's a, there's a co resonant effect. The Right, the frequency of the energy attracts and Julie Murphy: Exactly. Matt Kosterman: And trains pulls you down. Um, yeah. That's great. That's great. Um, so I guess that, I mean that, that, that ties in. I think you've really answered, you know, the question of how does one break free of the, the constrictions of lack. We get, we get stuck in this. I don't, I don't have enough every, it's all we, we live, we live from lack. Julie Murphy: Well, we don't have enough. It's very interesting. So I was just in Boulder a few weeks ago and I went into this, uh, crystal store and I met the most amazing human being. His name is Tenzin. And if you're ever in Boulder, it's called the Tibet Gallery. Amazing. But Tenzin said, you know, where he grew up, you're born with everything. You don't need anything. You're already born with it. Like, they understand that in Eastern philosophy, in the western world, we don't understand that as much. We think that there's something outside of us Yeah. Is actually better or more improved, and we need to fix ourselves at some level. But you are born perfect. You were born with all the tools to be exactly who you were meant to be in this world. And there's nothing wrong with you. Mm-hmm. Nothing. So when you realize that your lack is only because you're measuring yourself against something that's not you. And if you are you, you never feel like you have lack because you don't need anything else from the outside. You may want something from the outside. Matt Kosterman: Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: But you don't need anything from the outside. Like you don't need that person to love you. You don't need the recognition, you don't need the trophy. You don't need the, like think about we have a whole generation that everybody got a trophy. Like seriously. Right? Like you need to be validated by a trophy. Like, and it shows up for me today with my kids, is the fact that. They think that they're not validated if I as their mom don't show up to every sporting event mm-hmm. I go, my mom showed up to one a year and I had to get myself to those things. I know. Yeah. Yeah. And then they're like, well, you and 11 brothers and sisters, grandma couldn't be there. I'm like, okay. And I work and I fiscally provide for a lot of people. Right, right, right. So, but it's funny how we have a thing going on in our society where like we feel like, I'm like, am I providing for you to go play that sport that you absolutely love to play? So why is it that you can't just go play it and enjoy what I provided for you? Yeah. But if you, and, and it's not that I'm not there, I'm there more than most working parents are there. Right. But it's funny how it wires into the new generation. Like we've gotta watch how we are reinforcing lack. Mm-hmm. Because we think that something outside of us is gonna create the happiness and nothing outside of you is gonna create happiness. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And you can look at all e every single philosophy, it's all points back. It's all the answer's inside. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. Matt Kosterman: And it's exactly, and, and it goes against so much of our programming, right. Uh, in this society. I mean, I had, I had the same conversation with my youngest daughter who's a a, was a swim, has been a swimmer her whole life. And, you know, I don't remember how old she was, but she wanted her sister to be at the swim meet. Said, well, your sister's got something else here. I said, you, you swim because you wanna swim. That that's why you're swimming. You're not swimming anybody. Yeah. You don't need the validation. You don't need anybody to watch you. If you wanna swim, swim, Julie Murphy: that's, that's a sure sign that you're looking for something outside of yourself to make you happy. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: And that is never going to be accomplished because you'll search your entire lifetime and never find it. People come to me and they say, I've tried all these courses, I've worked with multiple financial planners. Mm-hmm. And I'm hoping this works. And I know right. When they say that they've tried all the traditional financial things. Right. I'm like, okay, well, I'm a little outta the box and I'll get you there and I know I will Matt Kosterman: you drink Julie Murphy: this and you might be doing ayahuasca in the jungle. Or you might be like, we're going some woo woo from Sedona, but I'm gonna get you there. I mean, they now know that there's energy work. Something that would take 10 years in traditional psychotherapy Yeah. Can be done in 30 seconds flat. Why would you do it over 10 years if you could do it a different way? 30 seconds. And it doesn't have to be psychedelics. No. There are other energetic ways to do that. Like a hundred percent. There are other people and other professionals that are energy healers that can still get you there because they're tapping into that holographic realm of the universe. Yeah. And quantum physicists know all of this stuff. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Yeah. The thing is, is we're not Julie Murphy: using it as a whole. Matt Kosterman: It's coming, it's coming together. The the spiritual thing. It's coming together and the spiritual and the, the physics of it. Uh, I mean, Julie Murphy: I know psychotherapists now. That do ayahuasca ceremonies with their patients because they think it works more effectively. Matt Kosterman: Mm-hmm. Julie Murphy: And it's like, it's this whole movement. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. I mean, I'm in, yeah, I'm in a deep three year training class in indigenous medicine and, and the, the ways of the shamans and the psychedelics and psychotherapy and all of that stuff. And it's, it, it's fascinating. Um, I wanted to go back to something and I don't remember what it was now. Um, oh, I, you know, I worked with a woman, Lizzie Cutler, another person who I hope to have on, and, and she does, uh, uh, energetic, um, I dunno, cord cutting, whatever you want. She, she, it's fascinating. She goes in and asks you to, to, uh, uh, think about some, a fear of something in, in one case. Mm-hmm. While you're thinking about this fear, it's bringing things up that she's able to feel into, see however she does it. And then she just removes them and they're gone. And I don't, I don't even remember what, you know, the only thing I remember is Yes, she brought, she brought up, uh. It, it, it brought me to the, my, my father fell out of a tree when I was 10 or 11 years old and broke his back. And it was highly traumatic and I hadn't really thought much about it as an impact in my, Julie Murphy: but how it, yeah. Matt Kosterman: You never know what Julie Murphy: impacts you. It could be big or small. Matt Kosterman: And that came up and I was like, wow, really? From 40 years ago, are you serious? And, and that was all her work with me was also a big part of, of moving, removing blocks that, that I didn't even know where. Um, but it wasn't, it wasn't via therapy. Julie Murphy: Yeah. It's key because that's all, and, and it's quantum leaps, Matt Kosterman: right? Because the therapy, the therapy's working here on the two foot and again, working on the two foot thing, Julie Murphy: the mines magnetic forces for two feet, Matt Kosterman: right? Julie Murphy: The heart mind eight. We have to clear the emotions out the heart. That's. What you do is you create energetic heart walls mm-hmm. To where it's blocking your heart. So you stop feeling. But really, unless you have an open heart and learning how to live from an open heart, you're not gonna feel fulfilled. You're just not. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Like, Julie Murphy: that's what we're here to do alive itself. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. I literally, I would lay in my bed in the morning in my, in our, in our a hundred year old house in the suburbs, and I would think, oh, you know, if I could just strip the molding back to the original Right. Julie Murphy: Pouring Matt Kosterman: hundreds of thousands of dollars into this sinkhole. Right. And I thought, no, I just, I'd be so much happier if this molding were different. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And that's not gonna change a damn thing. No. I, I watch people do that all the time. They have all these problems in their marriage and then they upgrade their house. I'm like, oh yeah. Right. Right. Here's not, or they have a baby. No. Having the baby, upgrading the house, buying the new fancy car, going on expensive vacations, never ever fix it. I know when the price tag goes up on people's vacations, they're in a career that doesn't really feed their heart and soul and they need a vacation from their life. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: But if you loved your life, you wouldn't need a vacation from it. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. 'cause wherever you go, there you are. Julie Murphy: Exactly. Yeah. So there are all these tell signs when people start spending in certain ways that I'm going, okay, now I got it. I see what's going on. Now let's address it so you don't create the crisis and let's shift it faster. That's the key. Matt Kosterman: That's the key. Yeah. Now, where were you in 2006 for crying out loud? I could have avoided all of this. Julie. Julie Murphy: Who knew I had no children. That's even funnier because I have four now. Matt Kosterman: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my gosh. Julie Murphy: I know. Hard to believe. Huh? Great stuff. And I want everyone just to hear like. It can be easy or it can be hard. You can choose. Matt Kosterman: You can choose. And I'd been, I'd been choosing hard and you told me in our last meeting, why don't you start choosing easy? That was what came through for you. Julie Murphy: Yeah. And it's okay for it to be easy when you learn how to be a scrapper from the south side, like I did, like my life's work is it's time for the fighting Irish to leave the building. Like I know how to fight, I know how to scratch. I know how to claw my way to the top. That is not how you have quantum leaps. Matt Kosterman: It's not fun. Julie Murphy: It's like it built my life up to a certain place, but it was based on my survival mechanisms as opposed to my thriving mechanisms. Matt Kosterman: Right. And the interesting thing about that is require you to surrender. Julie Murphy: Totally. Wow. And here, let's talk about surrender. I remember with Deepak Chopper, and I was like, he says, you just surrender, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, I don't surrender to shit. Mm-hmm. Like, I literally was like, mm-hmm. I don't surrender. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm. Right, right, right. So then I had to start telling my brain going, I co-create with the divine. Mm-hmm. Because I had a, I had to circumvent my ego. Yeah. My ego mind was like, I don't surround shit. And then I'd be like, because I was so feisty, and it's like, oh, I gotta co-create. Well now I have no problem. I'm surround because I've evolved. Right. But, but it's like, if you have a really strong ego, you might have to tell yourself you're co-creating for a little period of time. Matt Kosterman: Sure. But it's Julie Murphy: okay. Who cares? Whatever you gotta do to create a safe container so you don't have a hijacked nervous system so you can manifest exactly what you desire. Yeah. Matt Kosterman: Okay. Whatever that looks like. And whether that looks like body work, whether it looks like energy work, it doesn't matter. Yeah. And, and, and that's what I'll be going into in these episodes of just what are, and, and, and again, the permission slip is all of these things that you do are, are permission slips that you give yourself Right. To heal. And some people, you know, for years I did a lot of them and, and didn't feel like I was really moving very far. Uh, and that happened. You get caught in this thing again, and it's been, you know, looking in, it's been your advice. Uh, one of the, you know, most amazing pieces of advice you gave me was when I was, I came to you and I was just bitching and moaning about the pain and my pelvis and, and you said, well, have you asked the universe for help? And I was like, it never occurred to me, right? Because, or, Julie Murphy: or like, I gave advice to somebody today. I'm like, you know, you don't know the path to go, but why don't you just keep asking, well, what's the next right step? Just like when I was going, why am I sad? Why am I sad? Sometimes you just have to pose the question. And then the way has shown. Matt Kosterman: Yeah, a hundred percent. I mean, yeah, it was literally within three days after you, you know, I was like you said, you know, get quiet and ask. And so I did. And within a week a friend of mine had gave me access to the Gaia channel on, uh, a guest account on gaia.com. And the very first thing recommended was this man, Jonathan Tripote, who's gonna be a guest on, on, on the show here. Right. And he's a, a myofascial unwinding expert. And I, I, I didn't hardly have two nickels to rub together, but somehow I found 2,500 bucks to go to Sedona. And it started the next big transformation in my life. And that was a direct result of you saying, ask the universe. Julie Murphy: Yep. And it was what you needed to open you up to get to the next place. Yeah, yeah. Whatever that is. Yeah. You got it. And it's having that courage to step into it. Right. So for example, like you could have told yourself the story, I don't have the money, I can't do this. I gotta be fiscally prudent, I fucked myself up enough, blah, blah, blah, blah. Whatever story Yeah. You're gonna say, right? Yeah. So you could turn around and you could say that story, or you could turn around and be like, I just know I need to do it and I'm gonna trust. Because when you align with self and you do the things that, you know, you have this knowing like, I'm totally drawn to this, I gotta go do this. Matt Kosterman: Oh, I knew, I knew when I saw it. The Julie Murphy: money always shows up. So, Matt, let me ask this question to you. Since that day, how much has your income and your assets changed? Matt Kosterman: Uh, I mean it's, it's inverted. Like Julie Murphy: quantum, Matt Kosterman: quantum, Julie Murphy: quantum. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. Julie Murphy: Like night and day. Matt Kosterman: Night and day. Like Julie Murphy: completely opposite direction. Yeah, because money is the result. Getting money is the result of you aligning with you. Matt Kosterman: And, and I could, you know, and, and I, I, I've spent a lot of money on on this journey. On Julie Murphy: Yeah. Matt Kosterman: You know, and, and I don't regret any of it. I could, I could certainly look back and go, man, I could, I, you know, if I'd only hadn't spent that $2,000, or I only hadn't spent that, you know, 300, it's all been a, a part of it. Julie Murphy: Right. Right. Exactly. And, Matt Kosterman: and, and I'm, I've never not eaten. I've, you know, but even after all that stuff, I was in 2021. 2021. Yeah. Summer 2021. I had a five day eviction notice. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. Matt Kosterman: And I was getting thrown outta my place post COVID, you know, that was a mess, whatever. But it, it wasn't, I could blame all I wanted. It was me. I wasn't doing what I needed to do. And, but it was also the universe saying, it's time to leave this place. Julie Murphy: Right. Matt Kosterman: Energetically, I had a lot of trouble with that, the place I was in. So I took a leap. I, I, I, I, and the funny thing, you know, landlords will know this probably, but. It's actually pretty easy to get a recommendation to from a place who's throwing you out. 'cause they want you out. They're not gonna a bad, you're not gonna say, no, don't take him. I give you a Julie Murphy: stellar review. Matt Kosterman: So, I mean, it was just really funny. And so I ended up in a place where that's hilarious. I mean, think about it, right? What is the incentive system? It's all messed up. Oh my God. So I ended up, I ended up in a place that was literally almost double the rent and I hadn't been paying my rent. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. And Matt Kosterman: since I moved in here two, three and a half years ago, I haven't paid my rent late. Julie Murphy: Well, Matt Kosterman: not once. Julie Murphy: It was more e energetically aligned. It was an upgrade. And all the money followed because you were feeling good where you were. Matt Kosterman: Oh yeah. The first night that I was in the, the morning I woke up, I was just like, oh my, again the nervous system. Yeah. 'cause I were flooding problems. There was, it was dark, you know, it was, I, I, I didn't, there was a lot of bad stuff about the place. Julie Murphy: That's awesome. Matt Kosterman: Um, and the universe stepped in and supported me. Julie Murphy: Always does. Matt Kosterman: Yep. Every time. Julie Murphy: Always does. We just have to trust. Matt Kosterman: Gotta trust. Yeah. Gotta trust. That's the Julie Murphy: key. Matt Kosterman: Yeah. And, and, and language, like we talked about early language and words are super important. Julie Murphy: Huge. Matt Kosterman: What are the, the whole Julie Murphy: universe works on sound and vibration. So that's your frequency you're putting out there. So is that the sound and vibration you wanna put? Create Matt Kosterman: And, and it, and it also only, it only works. It, it's only, uh, in an affirmative. There's not a ne you can't, there's not a negative. So you never, you don't want, you don't wanna say, I'm not gonna do X anymore. Julie Murphy: Right. Matt Kosterman: Because it doesn't hear, it just hears X, it doesn't hear, not it hear, it hears do X. Julie Murphy: Right? Yep. That's in two of my books, speaking. The affirmative is very important. Matt Kosterman: Very, very important. Critical. And what are the, the four words that you really want to eliminate? Uh, uh, uh, but, uh, can't have you do you know this list? Julie Murphy: Try Matt Kosterman: try, but can't. And there's another one. Uh, Julie Murphy: won't because it won't, Matt Kosterman: no, won't is, won't, is in place of, can't, will not. I will not, instead of saying, I can't do this. Something that you don't want to do, just say, I will not. Julie Murphy: Mm-hmm. Yep. I'm, because then you're in an empowered state. Matt Kosterman: Right? And, and, but is one that you get rid of because, and let you can use, but only if it's, but negates the prior clause. Julie Murphy: Right. Matt Kosterman: So, you know, somebody says, well, well I'm not, well, I'm not bald, but I love hair. Well, I am bald. Well, it's like when I tell Julie Murphy: people what they wanna create in three to five years in their life, they say, oh, I would love this, but, and I'm like, Hey, no butts, no coconuts. We're not talking about butts. No. Yeah. Like go back to the brainstorming because you literally just goes, I want this, but I don't want this. I want this, but I don't want this. I don't this. It's like, no, no, no. You're confusing the universe. Don't do that. Matt Kosterman: Don't do that. Right. Julie Murphy: Don't do that. Matt Kosterman: Keep it in the affirmative. Right. Keep it in the expansive. Julie Murphy: Exactly. Matt Kosterman: Ah, well Julie, always so much fun. Julie Murphy: Well, thanks for having me. Matt Kosterman: It's so much absolutely links to all these things in the appropriate place where links go. I'm still learning the ropes here. And uh, have a beautiful rest of the day. Julie Murphy: Thank you. You too. Matt Kosterman: I hope to see you soon. Julie Murphy: You will. For now. Matt Kosterman: Alright. Bye-bye. Julie Murphy: Bye.