Zach Diamond  0:00  
 hello and welcome to episode number four of the modern classrooms podcast. My name is Zach diamond, taking over hosting duties from Korean this week, and I am joined by two great guests, both are all star educators who excel at building positive relationships with students on my internet. Left, Mr. Michael Carr, high school math teacher and modern classrooms implementer at West Potomac High School in Northern Virginia. How are you, Mike? 

Michael Carr  0:35  
I'm great. Thanks for having me, 

Zach Diamond  0:36  
of course and on my internet right. Toni Rose Deanon, a former colleague of mine and now an instructional coach for technology at the Overlake School in Redmond, Washington. Hey Toni Rose 

Toni Rose Deanon  0:49  
hi. Excited to be here.

Michael Carr  0:55  
Relationship Building is trying as hard as possible to be judgment free when talking to kids, unless, of course, it's a matter of professionalism, like some things were legally obligated to report. But other than that, just listening and not trying to be a teacher all the time. For instance, today, one of my kids that I've had a couple years, told me that he's now he lives him and his mom moved out from his dad, and he's paying rent and working, and he started to bad mouth his dad, and we have, like, a natural tendency to, like, yeah, don't do that. Like, don't do instead of, instead of that. Just listen, because I don't know the guy. So I figure it's better to to kind of keep that relationship with my student pristine, instead of trying to defend a person that I don't know. 

Zach Diamond  1:45  
Yeah, I mean, I love that, because it's like, if you were to come in and step in and defend the other person, it's like you're taking away the student's voice too. And I think that a big part of this is is listening to the students and just letting them be who they are. And it's not so much the relationship, but it's more like letting the student just be themself, and you being the person who's sort of in charge in the classroom, letting them do that,

Toni Rose Deanon  2:09  
and I am showing and sharing who I am as a person, so that they kind of understand, like, Hey, Ms. D is also human. She's not just a teacher. And so it just kind of opens up a trusting relationship, where students are able to share with me a lot of different things, and then I make sure to show up for them whenever they need me. And I think my my fifth grade teacher, my fifth grade English teacher, Miss Tidwell, was actually the one who made me realize how important relationships are between teacher and students. Because, you know, students, we spend so much time at school, and it's really nice to have that trusted adult. And I experienced that as a fifth grader, and ultimately that's that school year led me to want to be a teacher, because if she can do that, I can also do that, and I wanted to just make sure that I could provide a safe space for my students so that they're able to excel and succeed and like, do all of these really cool things together and independently. 

Zach Diamond  3:06  
Yeah, but I remember, I remember at the end of last year, when we've actually, when we first started distance learning, you were teaching, like, over Tiktok, right? 

Toni Rose Deanon  3:16  
I was, and it was really funny, because my sixth graders all school year long were, you know, were like, Miss D, you have to try out tick tock. And I was so adamant. I was like, No, I already have all of these other social media stuff that I need to to focus on. I can't do another one. And then quarantine hit, and I saw that a lot of my students were using tick tock and we were writing narratives. So I was like, hey, what's another cool way to do some kind of micro learning for them? Because they're always on tick tock anyway. And so I started creating videos, and they, like, loved it. It was great. Yeah. I mean, that's but even just the very fact of using tick tock and like, you being open to that as a possibility, I think, makes you the kind of teacher who would be a favorite teacher. You know, it's because it's not like, it's not like you're acting cool for them. It's just like you're letting the thing that they like be a part of the classroom. I don't know, would you see it that way? Oh, yeah, definitely. Because, you know, I can't, I can't beat, you know, tick tock, right? Like, that's what the kids are so into right now. So I was like, You know what? Let me use this as a leverage and this could be a teaching tool, and it was a great way to seeing the other teachers using Tiktok. And so I was like, okay, teachers are teaching. Teachers. Let me use this to teach my students 

Zach Diamond  4:31  
that story you were telling about a student who told you about something really personal in his family. I'm curious, like, how you get to a place like that, with it, with a student

Michael Carr  4:43  
three words open door policy. So that kid I met before he was my student, my students feel very comfortable dropping in no matter what, and thanks in part to the modern classrooms model, because I'm not. Lecturing. They know that they're not interrupting a lesson, so to speak. But my door is really always open, and it becomes part of the culture, like my students in my class know that other students will be dropping by every day. I get like, 10 visitors a class period, and I think that's because I've noticed that teachers treat the students that they teach like, it's kind of like, that's my group, that those are my kids. I treat all the students as if they're my students. So I don't have 100 students. I have 2600 students. Or I would, I would strive for that, because that's how many students are at my school. So my students bring friends, my students from past years drop in, and we just kind of chop it up, and the students who are new can see that relationship, and it kind of, it builds confidence. It's like, Oh, Mr. Carr is cool. Oh, we can talk to Mr. Carr clearly. Look, there's 10 kids coming, like during lunch or whenever to just talk to him. And I also think for social emotional learning. You cannot be afraid to address issues in the moment. I know a lot of times we like to focus on the content and kind of shove the social emotional learning to the side, but I think you need to be fearless and like if you see something that needs to be addressed, you need to stop class, stop what you're doing, and talk, talk to the students that are involved, and then include other other students in the class as well, or just from listening, they can kind of learn something. But I see the job as 5050 50% teaching content and 50% just being there, social, socially and emotionally for the students.

Michael Carr  6:42  
I think that it's important also to not just be talking all the time, but also to be listening when students those precious times where they do say something, and the most important, actionable part of that is to try the things they suggest, and sometimes they're actually good things. So one example is Lo Fi hip hop. I don't know if anyone's heard of it. Great work, music, no lyrics. And there's this artist called chilled cow, and he, I think he's a gene. So if you're out there listening and you want some classroom music, play chill cow Lo Fi hip hop. Because I think adults have a tendency to think that kids don't know what they're talking about, but they are the future. They create the trends. So, you know, I think we should be listening when they do have the courage or just dare to speak up. 

Toni Rose Deanon  7:29  
Yeah, and that's really funny that you mentioned that, Michael, because I'm always asking the students what they think. And if there's like, a blind spot that I missed right, my students will always hold me accountable for it, and I think they appreciate that. Because, you know, with the modern classroom project, you have your reflections, right? So your students are able to rate how they did, and then rate how the lesson went and any changes. And so students really react well when they give you feedback the day before, and then you were able to implement it right away. And then you'll hear like, comments, I know, like, I've done that a couple of times, and it's literally kids would be like, Oh, Misty actually listened. And then they're even more invested in the in the class. It's just, I just love this model, and just because it just frees up my time to have conversations with kids. 

Michael Carr  8:22  
And the interesting thing too is that the classroom running by itself is a large part is due to the model, but it's also a indicator of success in relationship building. And I have to tell the story. But I was coming back from a meeting, late from lunch. It was, I was like, seven minutes late, which in teacher time is, like, you might as well not show up, like the kids are going crazy. That's what's in that's what's in your mind. And I had left one student, one of my students that was there at lunch. I was like, I'm gonna close the door for now. If students show if I'm late, let everyone in. And I got to class probably 10 minutes late, and every student was working. And I'm like, What is this? And I think it was partly because, like, if you're their favorite teacher, they don't want to disappoint you. They don't want to let you down. It's like, Mr. Carr gives us a ton of freedom anyway. So why are we going to act crazy when he's we we know there's a situation like, let's not make him more stressed. 

Zach Diamond  9:16  
Yeah, that's, that's a great point. That's a great point

Michael Carr  9:22  
being the favorite teacher is different than being the Cool Teacher. And, yeah, some teachers are the Cool Teacher, but I think the thing that's more important is to be your authentic self, because students can figure out if you're a phony in five seconds. And it's also, like exhausting to try to be something you're not in front of 30 pairs of eyes, like, you know, like, it's just a recipe for disaster. So I've, I would suggest, if you're, if you're the Cool Teacher, fine, but if you're like, the uptight teacher, then be uptight about everything. And like, you know, like, own it, own who you are. And I think the kids, like, come to respect that, and they appreciate it. 

Toni Rose Deanon  10:00  
Yeah, most definitely it's it's all about just being your authentic self. There's no need for you to try and put up a front if you're not interested in something, don't be interested in it, right? And you can just tell the kids like mad that doesn't interest me, like when my kids talk about Minecraft. No, I don't have any interest. But I think again, just like being genuine, being genuinely yourself, they know when someone really cares about them and when someone's putting up a front 

Zach Diamond  10:30  
Yeah, and it's interesting, too. I think that you can remain a student's favorite teacher even if you say something that's pretty like harsh to them, if you're doing it well, first of all, if they already know that you're coming from a place of good intentions, right? But you can say some pretty difficult things to kids about their work, especially, I teach music, right? So sometimes I have to just be like, Look, this is very bad, like, you need to go back and do this again, or you need to fix this specific thing and and they'll still like you, because they know that you're you're not doing it out of like, spite or out of anything personal, you're trying to help. And I think that that that was something that really struck me when I first started teaching, was seeing that these, some of these really great teachers that were at the school that I was at were able to be so mean to the kids, even see the kids failing that class, and have them still sort of flock to that classroom. Have that be their favorite class? Yeah, I think it's all about being authentic. I agree.

Zach Diamond  11:30  
Check out all the modern classroom stuff at www.modernclassrooms.org you can find everything you need there. It'll point you in the right directions to learn more about the model, learn more about our work and learn more about the mentorship program as well, if you're interested. So thank you so much for listening. We will be back next week with another episode of the modern classrooms podcast. 

Transcribed by https://otter.ai